dark angel9 Posted June 16, 2011 Posted June 16, 2011 I have been with my boyfriend for 4 months. Lately, I felt like we lost a lot of the spark/passion and sex seemed almost like a chore to him. Despite this, he kept in contact regularly, sent me sweet good morning/good night texts, saw each other often etc.... We have tentative plans for Friday night that I suggested and he agreed. Now, he is one of those super nice guys who have trouble saying no to people (just something to keep in mind). He texted me this morning as usual and we exchanged a few sweet/teasing texts. Then I asked him if we are still on for Friday night? and no response. This was 3 hours ago. Also something to keep in mind: in the 4 months we have been dating, he never went more than 15 minutes without responding to texts. I mean not one single time. So this is unusual. I even thought he may be doing something so I rang him from a private number and he answered the call immediately. I hang up. So yeah, he received my text but is not responding. I am just annoyed. It's fine to say no to Friday, it's fine to even break up with me. But keeping me hanging (which he knows is something I hate) is just cruel Also, in context of lost spark, I am worried. What should I do? Re-text him again? Call him? Do nothing? I just wish he would tell me, one way or the other
ToF Posted June 16, 2011 Posted June 16, 2011 Call him from YOUR phone number. If he doesn't answer, leave it and see what happens. It's only Wednesday.
xyzzzz Posted June 16, 2011 Posted June 16, 2011 why did you hang up??..just call him and ask about this.why make such a simple thing complicated? about the whole situation,maybe he's stressed from work? try talk to him? ask him not to be too nice cuz that actually worsen the problem
dark angel9 Posted June 16, 2011 Author Posted June 16, 2011 I know, but he doesn't do things like this. He never did. He ALWAYS responds to things. Something is really off I am trying not to to be needy and clingy.
dark angel9 Posted June 16, 2011 Author Posted June 16, 2011 I guess calling him would just be a bit too pushy after the text. I have been initiating lot of things lately. Just in light of this, it already feels like I am chasing him. But we are in an established, official, exclusive relationship....there shouldn't be c.... like this. I am also worried that if I call, he will just say yes to Friday even if he doesn't want to go... Which is the last thing I want.
ToF Posted June 16, 2011 Posted June 16, 2011 Just call him. Calling him isn't pushy as long as you only do it once. And how about you make some of your own plans for Friday?
xyzzzz Posted June 16, 2011 Posted June 16, 2011 well at early stage every couple is affactionate but then they all start to cool down. maybe today is the day your bf stops responding to you every second. usually i wouldnt worry about it. maybe he is still deciding that's why he doesnt anser you right away. but you know better about your relationship than me. so if you feel necessary,just talk to him.
MizzGee Posted June 16, 2011 Posted June 16, 2011 I understand how frustrating it is when a guy stops texting for whatever reason... There's simply not being good at checking one's phone, but to just not answer a text after having answered almost immediately every time before? So rude!! It drives me crazy! Its like some guys just stop communicating when something they don't like happens, and it is so immature! But I agree that you should call him, from YOUR phone. And if he doesn't pick up, call him from the other line again. If he picks up then, I believe you have reason to let him know that you're upset, because he is purposefully screening your calls. Of course, do so in a calm manner.. don't just suddenly attack him haha Actually, you could try the "rubber-band effect..." when he starts becoming distant, you give him some space and let him come to you. Maybe he has some stuff he needs working out.. Maybe now's the time he'll start thinking for himself and not feel like he has to do every little thing you suggest.
dark angel9 Posted June 16, 2011 Author Posted June 16, 2011 He responded with " let's talk about it tonight" I responded: "Just so you know cutie, if you would rather have a boy's night or something, feel free to tell me it's no problem." (trying to sound breezy) Him: "I would rather dance with you than with Mike " Me: "OK then, it's on I would love to see you" Him: "I would love to see you too, if you like you can bring your stuff and stay over so that we can spend Saturday together and then go to that party on Sat night. You are also welcome to spend Sunday with me...but I totally understand if you have to study or would rather see friends or something" So looks like it's all good!!
MyNinja Posted June 16, 2011 Posted June 16, 2011 I'm so glad everything worked out When you look at it now it seems he didn't want to immediately respond because he was still coming up with ideas. In the future when something like this happens try to place yourself in his position and realize it's probably the opposite of what you're thinking, especially if there's nothing to show that he's uninterested. I think we sometimes place too much importance on texts and when/if someone responds. It is very easy to misinterpret a text.....or lack thereof. Have fun! Until we meet again...
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