sick of life

[nsomnia912]

I am exhausted...

I Just am so tired

 

I feel alone

and i just feel like giving up

 

im so heartbroken... i have been heartbroken for so many years

 

my life is going nowhere

my mind is just blank now

 

rejection letter after rejection letter... "I cannot sell your writing, its not something people want to read"

while everyone around me says its wonderful and inspiring... all just blowing smoke up my ass...

 

wife left me for another man 4 years ago... and is in bliss

love of my life for 3 years up and left and no with another man after 2 weeks post BU and is "having the time of my life" "everything is perfect"

every one! every * * * * ing one... seems to have the best life ever once they leave me... like i am that horrible, to where life is appreciated after spending time with me

 

I * * * * up one night stands, I mean who does that.

no friends

2 family members... that are just sick of hearing my * * * *

 

where the * * * * is this beauty in life? all i see is an endless nightmare of rejection and torture

 

I just feel like its not worth it anymore...

I feel like I just accept the fact to sit alone until I die... which i ask for every day

just to take me from this

 

I hate my life... I * * * * ING HATE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I hate everything about it.... and I hate the fact i was born

I hate the fact im still here

I dont want to do anything about it, cause im sick of failing.

im sick of trying....

 

im exhausted

im just exhausted

 

I dont want this life anymore, i just dont want it!!!

[LAYAAN]

I know how it feels to be down, depressed, discouraged, lonely, sad. Its okay. Vent it out. But you can't give up on yourself. Hang in there.

Jot down areas of life that you need to improve on. Take charge of your life. Understand that not everything is in your control.

If you can't sell your writing right now, can you do something else to keep paying the bills? Is there any other skill you have that you can market? May be get creative about your own writing. Where else can you market it? Think about it.

If your wife left you because of you, then you need to go within and look for reasons and fix those areas of life. Sometimes thats the only wake up call that we hear... when our loved ones leave us.

You will not sit alone and die. Life is not about that. You will get out of this, everything will be smooth-going again, but you need to take charge of your life. You have responsibility for your life. You can't give up on yourself. Something will work out. Hang in there.