no contact worked then backfired

[rjm102]

My ex girlfriend and i broke up about a month and a half ago after dating for over 2 years because we were arguing a lot, i kind of took her for granted after about a year and a half and stopped taking her out a lot, then i lost my job so i was having financial problems and took it out on her. I used the no contact rule and it worked perfectly. She apologized to me for breaking up with me, told me how much she missed me, then we got together and everything seemed like it was back to normal. She now calls me just about everyday but whenever i ask her to hang out, she says she's going out with her friends. She used to always want to hang out with me and now she would rather go out and get drunk with her friends then hang out with me anymore. Any thoughts, tips, or suggestions?

[corgidude]

You're expecting too much right now. You guys broke up for a reason, you can't just pretend like it never happened and carry on as such. You pretty much need to look at this like you're starting your relationship over. Make plans for one or two days in a week to spend together, but otherwise, each do your own thing. You can't just jump back into things, because the overall dynamic of your relationship has changed. She needs to feel at ease about the situation, and if you're constantly asking her to spend time with you, it's creating pressure. Ease off a bit, lower your expectations for seeing one another so often.

 

You've cleared the first hurdle, don't rush things, and just ease into it. Don't trip yourself up by expecting too much too soon.

[Live-N-Learn]

IDK, your back together but she would rather hang out with her friends. Something doesn't feel right. Be careful.

[Ms Darcy]

When did you two get back together?

[rjm102]

ok thanks a lot....that sounds right....it just makes me think a lot because she'll call me and we'll have a nice conversation then say i'll call you right back then she won't call me until the next day....and after a weekend is over, she always asks me if i met another girl or hooked up with another girl. But thats a good thing right? So should i ask her to hang out next or wait until she wants to hang out?

[rjm102]

we got together about 10 days ago before she went on vacation with her girlfriends but we haven't seen each other since she left for vacation

[rjm102]

and while she was on vacation she kept asking me if i got with any other girls and that she missed me but when she got back she has just been going out with her friends

[italiannmf24]

Why would she ask you if you got with any other girls if your back together?

 

Also, I'd take things easy, like corgidude said, it's a new relationship so hopefull you won't fall into the same patterns this time. Take it one step at a time.

[rjm102]

Well we got together a couple of times to hang out but we didn't say were officially back together but she actually just called me and asked if we could hang out tomorrow...I'm probably just over analyzing everything....thanks a lot for the help everyone

[Danny77]

Its like the movie pet semetry?

 

"Sometimes death is better"

 

so our heros wife dies and he knows that if he buries her in the indian ground that next day she'll be alive again.

Problem is that when they do regain life and dig their way out and come home they are not the person that they used to be!

All crazy and psycho and try to kill you!

 

I suggest you watch this movie.

 

I'm not saying she's gonna try and kill you but.... somtimes, death is better.