Ran into the ex this weekend...

[chitown9]

I think that you handled it like a gentleman.

[italiannmf24]

I honestly think you handled that situation perfectly. I do agree that her asking about where you and your friends were was crossing the line, though.

 

Good stuff Live-N-Learn, keep doin' you.

[browneyedgirl36]

I think you handled this very well, L-N-L, and I don't think you necessarily should have left any earlier unless you were SO uncomfortable that you absolutely couldn't stand it. If anything, by sticking around a bit, you showed that you had your emotions in check and that her presence wasn't getting to you. I know you feel icky right now, but that's to be expected. Once more time goes by without seeing her, it'll start to feel better. Special bonus points that the new boyfriend was NOT there. That would've been awkward and horrible! (It's happened to me, with a guy I dated a few years back, and I did NOT handle it well!)

 

Keep on moving on...you're doing great! For some perspective, you might want to read your posts from this time last year...or even from 5 or 6 months ago...and see how far you've come!

[dramallama]

Well done, LNL. The old you would have been analysing this all night, or even sleeping with her. Don't think about it too much. Just try to avoid her if you can or even reject her phone call (send it to voicemail then not even listen to it). That really is the best way.

[Live-N-Learn]

I think you handled this very well, L-N-L, and I don't think you necessarily should have left any earlier unless you were SO uncomfortable that you absolutely couldn't stand it. If anything, by sticking around a bit, you showed that you had your emotions in check and that her presence wasn't getting to you.

Keep on moving on...you're doing great! For some perspective, you might want to read your posts from this time last year...or even from 5 or 6 months ago...and see how far you've come!

 

I never thought of it this way but I can see your point. The old me would have been all over her all night pining after her and taking any breadcrumb I could get. The fact the I was able to be around her as you said and keep my emotions totally in check was a great win for me. It showed me I have def grown and am on my way to being healed. Although, I don't feel like I am where I want to be yet in my healing, I am def not where I was the last time I saw her in February! I am sure it surprised her that I could handle myself as well as I did. It was a first!

[Live-N-Learn]

Well done, LNL. The old you would have been analysing this all night, or even sleeping with her. Don't think about it too much. Just try to avoid her if you can or even reject her phone call (send it to voicemail then not even listen to it). That really is the best way.

 

I am going to do everything in my power not to run into her again. I am also pulling away from the mutual friends for awhile. They are more of a problem for me that she is. They just can't stop bringing up her name when I am around them. I do not want to hear about anything that is going on in her life and need to pull back so that I can fully heal. I realize they are holding me back and I need to do what's best for me.

 

NC have been my savior. If it was not for NC I would not be where I am at today and been able to handle that situation like I did. I am starting to see her more clearly and it is becoming clear to me that she is not the one for me. I can wait til I get a year of NC under my belt!

[Live-N-Learn]

I do agree that her asking about where you and your friends were was crossing the line, though.

 

I agree, at the very least she should have texted and called one of them to see where they were not me. They are all her friends too so it is really not that big a deal. But since she knew I was with them she should have just went and did her own thing and not came over where I was. In the end it really doesn't matter. Neither of us have reached out to each other and are both honoring NC so it's all good. Just a bump in the road to healing.

[Cadence44]

I agree, at the very least she should have texted and called one of them to see where they were not me.

 

Since you answered the call while drunk, might I suggest changing your phone contact to display her name as "Don't you dare answer" or something similar so that you will prevent yourself from succumbing to any contact attempts by her in the future?

[Live-N-Learn]

Since you answered the call while drunk, might I suggest changing your phone contact to display her name as "Don't you dare answer" or something similar so that you will prevent yourself from succumbing to any contact attempts by her in the future?

 

I have changed it. I was not drunk but was tipsy and it was def a mistake to pick up the call. Anyways, not that big a deal at this point. I am back to NC and will be more careful if this ever happens again.