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Is a girl initiating a kiss that bad?

shoppienyc1

By shoppienyc1
in Dating Advice

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shoppienyc1 Rookie

shoppienyc1

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So I met this guy at a bar. He approached me, he was really nice and intelligent. He had just graduated from Brown, and was back in the city for good. He offered to buy me a drink. I accepted, and told him to join me at my table with my friends. There was only room for 1 person, and he was with a group of friends. So his friends told him they were leaving to another bar, and to join them. He declined, and stayed with me instead. We had a good conversation, and had a lot in common. There was a lot of chemistry. Hours went by, and he asked me to come with him to meet up with his friends at a Japanese restaurant. All his friends were really nice, and we all got along. When it was time to go home, I suggested we take a cab together. When we were in the cab, he was holding my hand, and touching my knee. So I took this the perfect moment to kiss him. He was taken aback by my forwardness.The kiss was really short, because we had arrived at his house. Before he left the cab, we exchanged numbers. He asked me to come upstairs, and i politely declined. I texted him when I got home, and said Lets hang out soon. He never responded. So now I'm retracing my night, and everything was perfect until the kiss. So now I'm wondering if I made a mistake by moving too fast? All the signs pointed to him wanting to kiss me, but maybe was too shy to initiate it.

 

Help! I would like to see him again. What should I do? Should I cease texting him until he texts me?

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CMS Explorer

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Give it some time, I would say from my personal experience that he was expecting hook up after you started the kiss (ask you to come up) and you declining it is throwing him off a bit. So give him sometimes to think over this. Chalk him up as not interested if he never responded within 1 week.

 

PS. I personally find that ladies who goes for what they want to be highly attractive.

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Crazyaboutdogs Proficient

Crazyaboutdogs

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I think this guy was looking to hook up...I don't think kissing him was the problem..I think it was the fact that you didn't go up to his place and have sex with him. Face it, he was at a bar, he hit on you, you showed interest, he bailed on his friends in order to be with you, you suggested taking a taxi together, he got dropped at his place first. All the signs were there for a one night stand..I think his only shock was that you kissed him in the car and he probably figured the action would start upstairs, not down in the taxi. While you may have thought all this was just innocent interest and possibly someone to date, his mind was probably thinking easy hookup.

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FairyGodmother Enthusiast

FairyGodmother

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I don't think you did anything wrong in initiating the kiss. And as to why he hasn't responded there could be a number of reasons (phone's dead/broken/lost, he's sleeping/busy etcetc). I would say if you don't get a reply within about a week and a half just let it go. And I know it's hard but WHATEVER YOU DO DON'T TEXT HIM AGAIN UNTIL HE TEXTS YOU BACK. That makes you look needy/clingy; you already made the first move by kissing him. It's his turn to put a little effort in

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blackhawks1287 Contributor

blackhawks1287

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Give it some time, I would say from my personal experience that he was expecting hook up after you started the kiss (ask you to come up) and you declining it is throwing him off a bit. So give him sometimes to think over this. Chalk him up as not interested if he never responded within 1 week.

 

PS. I personally find that ladies who goes for what they want to be highly attractive.

 

I love aggressive assertive girls that know what they want...so hotttt. Even if they don't hook up with you the first night.

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mouseno4 Explorer

mouseno4

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I love aggressive assertive girls that know what they want...so hotttt. Even if they don't hook up with you the first night.

 

Correct words there. Aggressive assertive is what i would DREAM of in a relationship. One who is happy to take control whenever she wants it or when i relinquish it.

 

Her - Lets go to X restaurant for dinner tonight.

Me - Great idea, lets go!

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shoppienyc1 Rookie

shoppienyc1

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HAHA thanks guys! I don't know where I got the balls to do it, but hey! Anyways, I kind of texted him(I couldn't help it, I know, I know) with a picture of french toast at this spot he said he's been dying to go to. I said "THIS IS THE BEST FRENCH TOAST EVER" I thought he would appreciate my thoughtfulness, and admire the fact I remembered what we talked about. I got no reply, but now I know he's definitely not interested. Cmon guys, wouldn't you reply to a cute gesture like that?

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blackhawks1287 Contributor

blackhawks1287

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HAHA thanks guys! I don't know where I got the balls to do it, but hey! Anyways, I kind of texted him(I couldn't help it, I know, I know) with a picture of french toast at this spot he said he's been dying to go to. I said "THIS IS THE BEST FRENCH TOAST EVER" I thought he would appreciate my thoughtfulness, and admire the fact I remembered what we talked about. I got no reply, but now I know he's definitely not interested. Cmon guys, wouldn't you reply to a cute gesture like that?

 

From your story and how you went in for what you wanted...I of course would jump all over this...assuming there was mutual attraction and everything else.

 

To tell you the truth...no guy in his right mind would be that put off about not getting some that quick. At least from my perspective.

 

Send me that picture next time, and I will follow it up with a picture of hash browns and some bacon with a catchy slogan like "they would be better together"

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