Anusha Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 So Im really wanting to know when me and my guy will meet next but I dont know if I should ask.We went out on saturday and today I asked him if we could meet and he said that wasnt possible cause he is going to the gym.I really thought about asking "When we will meet this week then?" but decided was better not.Im the one that usualy takes care of that and I also dont want him to feel pressured to go out with me so I thought maybe was better to just wait until he bring that up.But at the same time Im afraid that he wont and I would like to know it now already.Anyway you think I should ask? Link to comment
penelope13 Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 No. Give him the chance to take initiative and give yourself the chance to experience that a relationship can develop without you trying to control everything. Link to comment
IStandoutI Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 I think you should wait, give him a moment alone and let him realize the kind of person you are, if he really does like you, just let him ask Link to comment
Deejmonster Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 I would wait a few more days and see what comes of it Link to comment
Anusha Posted June 6, 2011 Author Share Posted June 6, 2011 But what if he is waiting for me to ask(since I usualy do that)? I dont want to miss meeting with him because of that. Link to comment
IStandoutI Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 Well how about you wait just one more day and if you think it's best for you to ask then by all means! Go with your gut feeling and if it works out then thats great! Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 I think that the biggest problem you have is the insecurity. It will drive him away if you do not get a handle on yourself!! I would let him initiate something, call you more often, etc. if he does not, it's because he's not as into the relationship as you are. Link to comment
-Sanguine- Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 Let him ask you to hang out. If he doesn't, then he just wasn't as interested as you are and it's better to know that now than months into dating him. If he does, then that's great Just don't get too worked up over it. Link to comment
Anusha Posted June 6, 2011 Author Share Posted June 6, 2011 I think that the biggest problem you have is the insecurity. It will drive him away if you do not get a handle on yourself!! I would let him initiate something, call you more often, etc. if he does not, it's because he's not as into the relationship as you are. I know what you mean,I know I need to back of but I just cant.Is like when I really like somebody I go crazy and start doing those things.I keep playing on my head every talk we had to see if I did or said anything wrong,keep wondering when we will talk or see each other next and just cant relax and let things happen. Link to comment
penelope13 Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 Imbalance in a relationship/friendship is never a good thing. Thus you need to give him the option to initiate and demonstrate his interest in you. You don't want to be in a situation where he agrees to see you when you suggest something, just because he doesn't have anything better to do in that moment. Link to comment
penelope13 Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 I know what you mean,I know I need to back of but I just cant.Is like when I really like somebody I go crazy and start doing those things.I keep playing on my head every talk we had to see if I did or said anything wrong,keep wondering when we will talk or see each other next and just cant relax and let things happen. You need to find something to keep yourself and your minds busy. You need to stop this pattern! Would you consider counseling? Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 Imbalance in a relationship/friendship is never a good thing. Thus you need to give him the option to initiate and demonstrate his interest in you. You don't want to be in a situation where he agrees to see you when you suggest something, just because he doesn't have anything better to do in that moment. I agree. It also creates a situation where he has no incentive to make plans with you in advance because he knows you will run to him at a drop of the hat. Especially if he doesn't have anything more interesting planned for that night. Link to comment
Anusha Posted June 6, 2011 Author Share Posted June 6, 2011 You need to find something to keep yourself and your minds busy. You need to stop this pattern! Would you consider counseling? Yes I have,I think that could help me maybe.Im just really liking this guy and dont want to lose him but I know I have to stop cause if I keep holding too tigh he just will start to feel smothered. Link to comment
penelope13 Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 If you want to accomplish something, anything always ask yourself this question: in what way are my actions beneficial towards accomplishing my goal? Is there another action that would be more beneficial? Keep your LONG TERM goal in mind. Don't focus on relieving the momentary anxiety. Link to comment
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