reverse cowgirl..is it supposed to be this uncomfortable?

[monty77]

So me and my boyfriend have been dating close to 8 1/2 months, and we've had sex...a lot. Last week I experimented with a new position, the reverse cowgirl, and it actually felt pretty good. The only problem I find is that I feel extremely uncomfortable doing it.

 

My self esteem as it is stands pretty low, I'm 5'9 and wear size 10 pants, so to say the least im a pretty sturdy girl. My boyfriend isnt really one to give compliments all that much, so I never feel totally comfortable having sex becasue im too conscious as to how my body looks naked, ya know?

 

so while in the reverse cowgirl positition, my boyfriend has a clear view of the backside of me..and i feel extrememly uncomfortable the whole time. It's like i want to hide myself...Im starting to think the position isnt the problem, its how I view myself? HELP!

[FathomFear]

Yeah, I would agree with your gut. It sounds like your discomfort is mental and not physical. If you're having sex with a guy and worrying about him seeing you naked as you're having sex, there are body issues there which you need to address.

 

In any case, if you're having sex "a lot" I would say that your boyfriend has accepted you for who you are. You either need to do the same yourself and/or take steps (exercise, etc) to improve your situation until you meet your goals.

[mouseno4]

Whilst i sort of agree with Fathom, i dont think it is only your problem. The problem i think (no i never tried that position as i like to be able to gauge the pleasure of the girl - see her face) is that YOU cant see his face. You cant see what he is looking at. I think you feel you need to know he is ok with what you look like. Dont worry, it is very common. I would suggest you need reassurance from your guy about your body. Perhaps take a break maybe?

 

From what i have been able to gather, a guy paying more attention to your body does wonders for a girl's self esteem. Makes her feel attractive to him. And keep in mind it only matters that he is attracted to you, and not how others think. But on the other hand, you need to be comfortable with your own body or it may affect some things.

 

Perhaps try a different position that enables you to see in his eyes during the event.

 

Good luck!

[partydelights]

Hi Monty77,

 

I'm a male, married for more than a decade and considered myself "active" sexually (well... evidence... my fifth child coming this Nov...).

 

My wife was probably like you and hid her feeling from me until recently. She told me she felt "ugly" because after giving birth(s), her body changes, especially her butt. Somehow nature require that part to "grow" to handle the weight of babies (yes I got twins before this pregnancy) in her.

 

She was depressed for a period of time and I did not know what actually triggers it. It affected our sex life a little. Finally, I found out she viewed herself "ugly" because before marriage, she was slim, "flat" and has a small butt.

 

But one thing she did not know. HER NEW LOOK PLEASES ME MORE THAN BEFORE OUR MARRIAGE!

 

In fact, I "worshiped" her more than ever and I had wet dreams doing her from behind! Many mornings (I'm a morning guy), I fantasizes doing it doggy.

 

Well, "ugly"? Yes from her stand point but definitely not from mine.

 

I think you should discreetly find out from your lover how he view your back and whether he likes what he sees. (Of course don't ask him so directly.) Knowing from his own mouth may boost your confidence, and who knows, you assets may actually become your triumph card!