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PLEASE Help Me Think Positive... Pulling My Hair Out...


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I just got some bad news.


My best friend/lover may be really sick again.


Last September he came really close to death... he spent 6 weeks in the hospital, endured five surgeries, was in a coma for two weeks, and flatlined once on the operating table. (He also had a near death experience, if that matters.)


But, he survived, thank Gods.


Earlier this week I was making plans with him for tonight... He's a tattoo artist. A guy I know was wanting to get tattooed this afternoon and then after that we were going to go see a mutual friend of ours.


I talked to him two days ago and all was fine. Yesterday goes by, no word from him at all. And for me to go a day without hearing from him is really strange. We talk every day. But, I figured he's probably busy. His life is pretty chaotic right now anyway.


The, today goes by, and nothing from him still. I texted him on my lunchbreak at work and asked what time we were meeting up tonight. No answer. This is so not like him. I kept thinking it was so strange that he would skip out on a tattoo, because that's his job. More tatts means more income. But I still figured maybe something just came up and I'm sure he would get in touch with me.


So I come home from work, take a shower, get ready to go. And the mutual friend we were going to see starts blowing my phone up wanting to know what time we are coming over.


By this time, I am not even caring about whether we go to see our friend or not. I just have a really bad feeling and I want to know everything is ok. I have a knack for knowing when people I am close to are in trouble. And I knew by this point something was wrong.


So I called him. No answer. And through all this I have to deal with this friend of ours getting all pissed off that we might not make it over.


Five minutes after I called, I got a text message from him. It said "I'm probably going to the ER, in a lot of pain." I told him if he's in a lot of pain to please go now and don't wait. He said the doctor told him to wait and see if the pain persists... I told him he really should go now... last time this happened he waited and waited until he was almost dead, then had to be rushed to emergency surgery.


But he told me he's waiting to see if it gets worse. He said he would keep me posted.


But now, I am going crazy... I am so upset and scared. Someone close to me died earlier this week. So right now I am already emotionally exhausted. I don't know how to handle this... I called a friend to see if we could go for a drive or something... she wasn't home. Called another friend, she wasn't home either. I am starving but can't eat. I am nervous and can't calm myself... I just keep thinking about the last time this happened.


I am posting here because I just need to get this out I guess. I don't have anyone to talk to right now. I doubt anyone can give me much advice. Just listening is good enough, but comments are still appreciated.

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What is his illness, Cynder? Is this the same problem he had before? I don't even know what it was.


In Septmeber he had what he thought was food poisining to begin with. He had a really high fever, was in a lot of pain, and the Doctor said drink 7up and get some rest... So he did, nothing improved... and a day or so later he was rushed into the hospital for emergency surgery. His large intestine ruptured.


So, I don't know what the exact name for what he had was... but that's what happened. He still isn't fully recovered from that. He still has one more surgery to go through...


It's not the same problem this time. He actually has to be on bed rest until his next surgery.

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But...how do you know it's not related? Are you going to see him?


He told me what the problem is. We've talked since I posted this thread... I am just not going into it here because I don't know enough to answer people's questions.

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