Bcom Posted June 4, 2011 Share Posted June 4, 2011 Today is so hard! I don't know why but I really miss her today! I had a dream about her last night and when I woke up I had tears on my face! There is absolutely no reason to miss her! She was far from nice! But I can't shake her memory! It's been hurting me and it's causing problems! I know it wasn't a good relationship but why can't I get over her? My love was real, very much so! I wish she would have cared! Link to comment
InLimboForEver Posted June 4, 2011 Share Posted June 4, 2011 Hey pal your not alone I am feeling exactly the same today.... Wondering how life can be so cruel, how she can be so cold.... I often wonder.... Then I realize this is what causes the hurt, wondering, thinking... Its best to try and keep busy as much as possible, keep your mind off her.... I know its hard, but they say time heals all wounds.... Then again there is only a certain amount of hurt any man can take... Just know that your not alone in this, I just hope it gets better for you, keep busy, stop thinking so much and remember tomorrow will be a better day! If not tomorrow, the day after! Link to comment
snow white Posted June 4, 2011 Share Posted June 4, 2011 whenever i have dreams about my ex i wake up and feel lonely that he's not laying in bed next to me, and then i can't get to sleep. the last time this happened was a couple of days ago, and i texted him and told him about it, not thinking he would be awake since we both are night owls and sleep in late. weirdly, he answered right back, saying he wasn't able to sleep at all because he was feeling so lonely. it makes me feel good that i'm not the only one that feels this way. Link to comment
CatsMeeoow Posted June 4, 2011 Share Posted June 4, 2011 Its good that you recognize that it wasn't a good relationship and that it makes no sense to miss that but its just how the human brain happens to be wired ---- to miss that which we can't have! It gets easier but it just takes some time. Link to comment
Live-N-Learn Posted June 4, 2011 Share Posted June 4, 2011 I find it so strange that many of us seem to miss those that treat us poorly. I think it has more to do with our self worth than missing them. We are looking to them to make us feel good about ourselves. I have been through this as well. Thankfully I am at a point that I have regained my self respect and no longer look to her for validation. This realization did not come easy. Link to comment
italiannmf24 Posted June 4, 2011 Share Posted June 4, 2011 As much as you miss her, do you think you'd really be better off with her? Link to comment
Bcom Posted June 4, 2011 Author Share Posted June 4, 2011 Thank you guys for being nice! No I don't think I would be better off with her! I know I wouldn't! She was very cold! She took my heart and ripped it right out of my chest! Eventhough I know that I still can't get rid of these feelings! But I have no reason to hold on to them! They just won't leave! It's tearing me apart! Link to comment
Bcom Posted June 5, 2011 Author Share Posted June 5, 2011 I told her when I left I will always love her! I really meant that! Link to comment
Silverbirch Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Hugs Bcom. How long has it been since the B/U. If it's been a while now, maybe you need to start thinking of going out on dates with other people or else thinking about the day when you will. Link to comment
Bcom Posted June 5, 2011 Author Share Posted June 5, 2011 Hey Silver! Thank you! It's been six months! I have went on other dates and attempted to move on but the memory of her still haunts me! I just want to forget about her and what she did to me but it's not happening! Link to comment
Silverbirch Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 It was like that with my ex ex, and eventually, it did go. He means absolutely nothing to me anymore. I ALMOST feel sorry for him. To be honest, it wasn't until I had been with another person for a fair while that I was completely rid of the really bad memories. Link to comment
Bcom Posted June 5, 2011 Author Share Posted June 5, 2011 I'm sorry to hear that silver! I wouldn't wish this pain on anyone! I am glad to read it gets better! I just hope that it will! Hugs! =) Link to comment
Silverbirch Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Bcom, I was with that guy - the ex ex - for 10 years. He had always been a fairly volatile person, but in the last 2 years, there was a real deterioration in his personality. He was then diagnosed with bipolar, was not always reliable with his medication and got addicted to the mania. He had never gambled in the first 8 years I was with him. He became addicted to poker machines and spending money, and within a few months, had to begin processes to declare bankruptcy. He also became extremely promiscuous and an amazing liar. He had never been violent to me, and began making serious threats and really scaring me. Police came looking for him. It was an unbelievable nightmare. I've been told that he likely also had Cluster B personality disorder as well as the bipolar. It was a really ugly breakup. He had also become very emotionally and verbally abusive. Because he had been diagnosed with a mental illness, I stayed believing that I would give hi my love and support and that things would settle down with the medication. I would not wish that relationship on anyone. Some of the things he said to me were so cruel, I wouldn't even post them. If you want to know what some of the stuff was, pm me. Gotta say that my most recent ex who got me here on ENA was absolutely nowhere in the league of the ex ex. Link to comment
Massari Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Bcom what you need is time and making yourself busy. Yes the nights and mornings are going to be the toughest times to deal with it. Almost everyone who posts here on ENA has been or is going thourgh something similar. when you were with her maybe you didn't see that she wasn't right for you, no one doubts that your love for her was anything else but real. you know you put your all and she was the one who never appreciated what she had. you miss her because she was a part of your life ( no matter what even if she was the wrong person for you) . you just need time , believe me when i say this! chin up Link to comment
soru Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Had a dream about my ex last night...I woke up depressed as all hell. And this break up is incredibly fresh too. I know exactly how you feel. I did soooo much yesterday. It was insane how spontaneous in activities I was being, but even then my mind wondered off to her. Link to comment
Bcom Posted June 5, 2011 Author Share Posted June 5, 2011 Soru that sucks I feel for you! Thanks for the support! It is insane how she can just pop back in my head! I need to forget her and leave her in the past! I'm not sure that will ever happen! No matter what I do she is right by my side in my mind! It's driving me crazy! Link to comment
nekoxchaos Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Yeah a while ago I had dreams about my ex too, and everytime i woke up I felt so upset.... we have been NC for the longest so far and I'm really proud of myself for not giving in and calling him or trying to contact him. I felt like he would expect me to cave in but this time I'm really trying my best but I have my good and bad days right now im in my sad days but we have to hang on and keep truckin Link to comment
Bcom Posted June 5, 2011 Author Share Posted June 5, 2011 Good job nekochaos! NC is hard but once you get through a little it gets easier! Your right we have to keep truckin! Link to comment
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