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My girlfriend dumped me and i don't know what to do


aim1
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Hi everyone, can any1 help me? I feel so lonely and down i'm a lesbian and my girlfriend finished me a week ago and i really don't know why and what to do. I was with her for just over a year and thought she was the one I'd just bought a house for us to live together in which i'm now left with and then she dropped the bomb shell that she wasn't happy and didn't want to be with me anymore. I was her first gay relationship she's 21 and i'm 23, she'd only ever been with men before and i never have but i know she did really love me. I knew things weren't right but i was prepared to work through them but i just feel like she has given up on us. She never brought herself to tell anyone other than our gay friends that she was with me and her mum only found out because she doesn't really care what her mum thinks of things as they don't get on. She went to talk to my brother the day after and said that if it was 'normal to be gay, i wouldn't have a problem with it, but its not and i can't cope' I feel gutted because i really feel that she does want to be with me but the commitment of moving in to a house with me would have meant her having to face the fact that she was with me and more people would have found out. she really is a daddy's girl even though he does not live in the family home and i think she could never bring herself to tell her dad or work mates. She told me she still loves me in a way and said that in time we might get back together or might not and thats whats drivin me crazy. she said she wishes things were like they used to be in the beginning but she feels the spark had gone for too long and she wants to find it with someone where it will never go away, but i think she's kiddin herself. she's also told me she probably will go straight and find a man she cares for, but how can she just turn off gay feelings and feelings for me after a year? Even though I kinda knew i wasn't happy with her as she was never happy and anything i did for her was never good enough and loads of times i'd think of finishing it myself i still can't help part of me wanting to still be with her. Please if anyone has any advice or has been in the same situation i'd love to hear off you.

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  • 7 months later...

Hi, I have no experience in gay relationships, but there were a few key things you mentioned. One, that you were her first female partner and second , that the "spark" has gone away. Now, these kind of things can happen in any relationship, but I think its possible that the "Novelty" of a gay relationship that she felt at first my have worn out, this is not to say its true but she may be thinking this, she probably wants to try men again kinda like for reference. Im sure she still cares for you as a person, and she is probably just trying to find her own identity, Id just tell her that you love her, and that youd be there for her if you need her.

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well I really empathise for you. I understand the pain you feel and to prove it I know you are thinking that there is no way I feel as bad as you. Well know that I think the same thing. She is probably saying these things to soften the blow of it. She may come around. She may not. I, like you just have to wait and see...

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