Life in the Driver's Seat

[Alezia]

Be careful if the paint on the wall is old. The color fades with time and sun, therefore what you have in your old can of paint may not match the wall color at all.

 

So what you envision as a small spot paint project may turn into something bigger fast.

[Seraphim]

Be careful if the paint on the wall is old. The color fades with time and sun, therefore what you have in your old can of paint may not match the wall color at all.

 

So what you envision as a small spot paint project may turn into something bigger fast.

 

The paint was applied this January when the windows were replaced. So I would have to buy a new paint, but obviously a better quality one, maybe they used cheap contractor's paint. This is a house on the military base so housing does all the repairs. I gather the stuff is cheap. My house back home that I own the stuff is much better quality.

[Seraphim]

Hm, well really irritated now.We changed our car insurance company and BOTH car insurance companies took out their payment. Nice. Not. Look, I emailed your cancellation 10 business days ago. Man, incompetence really makes me mad. And you have a job do you? Wow, making actual money? I would be surprised if you make more than a $1.98 a month based on performance. GRRR

[Seraphim]

It is interesting what the quake did, only in the physical terms of what it did to the earth. It contracted the Earth about 13 feet moving the entire country of Japan eastward 13 feet. It shifted the axis if the earth and sped up the rotation. HM wow.

 

In human terms we find such inspiring things. I saw a story of a man peddling around on his bike looking for his wife who is missing. Another of a business owner combing shelters looking for his employees to make sure they all survived, he has found 27 of the 50 employees.

[Seraphim]

I bought a little outfit for my niece for her birthday. Sigh, it is hard to look at all the little girl clothes. I usually walk past them quickly because I do not want to be sad. I have always wanted a little girl. My brother always wanted a boy. I have a boy and he has 3 girls. Sometimes God has a sense of humour.

[sherryberrypie]

God has a twisted sense of humour, but we should all be grateful for what we have

Maybe one day you will have a granddaughter to cherish!

[Seraphim]

I don't think I am ungrateful though. I cherish my son a lot. I have no idea what he will do in the future because he is only 13. He has said though he does not want to get married, but he wants to adopt kids and have me raise them.

 

I told him NO WAY. Raise your own kids. I will help you all you need but I am not raising your children if you are entirely capable.

[rocio]

I take it he doesn't have a girlfriend, then?

 

My 4 yr old daughter is afraid to get married, have kids and move out. She always used to say, "mom, did you know that when I'm grown up, there won't be any homes left? Even if daddy wants to buy me a house, all the houses will be taken." I didn't understand what was motivating her concerns so I used to reassure her, "don't worry. If all the houses are taken, we'll ask your Uncle L. to build you one." Recently she started saying, "What if I don't want to get a husband? Can I stay with you forevvvver?"

 

Then I realised where she was coming from. The idea of moving out and starting a new family scares her. Which of course makes sense for someone her age. So I say, "oh, thank you for staying with me forever. We will always be together."

[Seraphim]

No, he doesn't. He was interested in a girl last year but she was not interested in him. About 4 girls have been wild about him though. One girl was NUTS about him for several years, but we have moved from there. He was not interested in her at all. He would actively run away from her. He seems to like the quiet,modest,brainiac type. But those girls seem to be interested in guys later on.

 

Also too with his autism he realizes he when it comes to people he often has a need to tune them out because otherwise he has a brain overload. He interacts when he can and otherwise he likes to be solitary. He loves people a lot but he knows his limits thankfully when he is close to overload. I have found others get insulted when he wants to be alone. Sometimes his cousins cry when he won't play with them and they think he is doing it to insult them. They are too young to really understand the issues. Other people assume he is being rude because he just walks away in the middle of interacting. They do not get it. I have the sense he does not really want to inflict that on a woman, but he does love children a lot and wants to have them but refuses to have biological children out of wedlock. He would adopt though because he feels they need love.

[Seraphim]

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See this is emotionally where he is too in some senses. Some days he thinks about a life of his own and some days he is 3 and wants to be with mom forever. He is nowhere as independent and worldly as most kids his age. Socially you might mistake him for someone who is like 8 or 9 in a 13 year old body.

 

He has a lot of knowledge beyond his years and understands lots of things, but socially he is pretty limited. He is happy with this though. He is secure in who is he.

[rocio]

wow, those are some pretty deep thoughts for a 13 year old. I think part of his maturity has to do with the way you two interact. It seems like you have honest and deep conversations with him and talk to him like a person. From what you've written, it seems like you don't burden him with too many details but keep things simple yet honest.

[Seraphim]

In a way he is pretty mature for 13. Thank you so much for the great compliment UMA. We do get along famously. We are very close. Yes, I guess I do talk to him like he is a person, not just a child. I fully believe children are people too with rights and need for respect and love. I believe that with every fiber that I am. I pray to God I reflect that in my parenting.

[rocio]

I don't know why adults feel the need to dumb down their conversations with their children. You're really not doing them any favors.

[Seraphim]

Indeed.......

[Seraphim]

As reported by an American newspaper

 

"The world's fifth-largest, 8.8 magnitude quake was caused when the Pacific tectonic plate dived under the North American plate, which shifted Eastern Japan towards North America by about 13 feet (see NASA's before and after photos at right). The quake also shifted the earth's axis by 6.5 inches, shortened the day by 1.6 microseconds, and sunk Japan downward by about two feet. As Japan's eastern coastline sunk, the tsunami's waves rolled in.

Why did the quake shorten the day? The earth's mass shifted towards the center, spurring the planet to spin a bit faster. Last year's massive 8.8 magnitude earthquake in Chile also shortened the day, but by an even smaller fraction of a second. The 2004 Sumatra quake knocked a whopping 6.8 micro-seconds off the day."

 

If you think about it, really, um wow.

[Seraphim]

I returned to the gym today and did 15 mins on the bike and 15 or so on the tread mill. Then I did some upper body weights. My knee is not too bad thankfully.

 

I have some wicked allergic reactions happening here.

[Seraphim]

 

 

I REALLY despise when someone tells me to change a certain part of my personality,especially when they are someone half my age. When you get to be perfect you let me know. Till then get some respect.

[Seraphim]

I had an awesome visit with my mother for her birthday. We visited my in-laws first. Not my favourite thing to do, but I smiled and was polite as usual. I was so happy to go to my mother's house though. I am really close to my mother and we love each other a lot. The night of her birthday we took her and 12 other family members out and had a GREAT time. It was a steep bill for 12 people, but it was her birthday gift and she loved it.

[Seraphim]

Why do some people feel the need to be rude? It is almost like they take pride in it. Like a chip on their shoulder is some badge of honour or something.

[Seraphim]

What do you do with in laws that invite themselves over??? I saw my in laws the first day we went home. Oh joy oh bliss...not. Anyway, my sister in law says to me. (she is a teacher), I have a PD day April 8, so I can get off early and come to your house for the weekend. Not that I am inviting myself or anything, but are you cool with that?

 

UHHHH, sweetheart, that is called inviting yourself over. Now she says this in front of the entire family including her parents so she knows if I say no I looked like the beast daughter in law.

 

They better not start this again where they show up every second weekend. It is stiffling, and they entirely take over my house when they come over and decide what we are going to eat, what we are going to watch, everything. Last time my mother and father in law came my mother in law and I had to watch 5 hours of sports because that is what my father in law wanted to do. He watches sports or reads the entire time he is awake every day of the week.](*,)](*,)

 

They also wanted me to turn off my air conditioning in the summer because it bothers my mother in law's sinuses. Never mind that it is like 42C and I am about to throw up and die because I can not take the heat and nor can my son. They do not want air conditioning and have never had it in their life and see no reason for it. Not that they can not afford it they just do not want it. My father in law is very much my way or the highway and he means it. He also thinks he can boss me around because it is "his son's " house and he bosses his son around. SO freakin annoying.

[Seraphim]

Something that really annoyed me when we took my mom out for dinner for her birthday, this couple behind us was glaring at my cousin who has Downs. He was quiet and never said a word the whole time. They were gawking at him and giving dirty looks. I wanted to ask them what the heck they were looking at.

[sherryberrypie]

That's awful. Honestly, all of the people I've met who have downs could really teach a thing or two to the rest of society.

 

Fingers crossed that your in-laws don't start the trend of coming over all the time again (like they have done in the past, I take it?) I loved having the in-laws here for a week at christmas, but any more than that and I would have probably have gone a bit crazy. They were constantly turning on the heater, leaving all the lights on, leaving glasses and towels upstairs... Our electric bill was huge from that week. You may have to put your foot down, but I can understand how that would be really hard after having been in-laws for (20?) years.

[Seraphim]

That's awful. Honestly, all of the people I've met who have downs could really teach a thing or two to the rest of society.

 

Fingers crossed that your in-laws don't start the trend of coming over all the time again (like they have done in the past, I take it?) I loved having the in-laws here for a week at christmas, but any more than that and I would have probably have gone a bit crazy. They were constantly turning on the heater, leaving all the lights on, leaving glasses and towels upstairs... Our electric bill was huge from that week. You may have to put your foot down, but I can understand how that would be really hard after having been in-laws for (20?) years.

 

Hey Sherry,

 

Yeah, that is the thing, my cousin was no trouble to anyone. He is mostly non verbal because he is also autistic and he has the capacity of a 3 year old because his Down's is very severe and he was born 10 weeks early almost 30 years ago. He is really lucky to be alive. He is the sweetest guy though and he loves everyone and hugs them readily. It is so hard to believe there are still people like that, that treat the challenged that way. Although I should not be surprised because my son has been treated like crap by people in public too.

 

My inlaws came every week last summer, it truly drove me mad because they treat us like we are 12 years old and we are over 40. They have always treated us that way. My husband even now is afraid of his father because his dad emotionally terrorized him as a kid. He finally stood up to his dad and told him to not come too often because it was it was too overwhelming. It took a lot for him to say that. But really, it causes me panic attacks when they are here because they smoother me and take over my house.

 

Yeah, I have known my in laws 22 years, God help me.

[Seraphim]

Hm, my husband comes home with all these different places he could end up. Scary. Yemen, Libya, and maybe before he ever goes to Afghanistan. Being married to a soldier is not the easiest thing in the world.

[Seraphim]

I just saw the saddest news cast. This woman in Japan who had lost her eldest son to the tsunami, he was at school and he was swept away. She lost 6 other members of her family as well. She says she keeps smiling for her other son who is 6 and they both pretend they are happy for each other. Made me cry. Just a microcosm of what has happened to that country.