engraved2008 Posted February 1, 2011 Share Posted February 1, 2011 Long story short.Me and my boy share a saving acct together for vacation purposes.Now i m generous with him and i take him out when i can.i told him i want to save a bit so we can go to a vacation together,but he cannot help with anymoney right now so i just putted money in that acct. Now he was honest to tell me he ll use the card for a pizza to eat at work 15.I say ok.When i looked at account next day he took $ 45 not 15.but he did not tell me.The point is that he buys stuff he dont need,games ,dvd and stuff and cannot afford lunch.When he eats lunch is 15 or more. Should i be upset?i do not want to make a big deal,but he works 60 hours a week and seems to live beyond his means.How to adress the issue ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WindowTo Posted February 1, 2011 Share Posted February 1, 2011 Wow that is a major betrayal of trust. Is there any good reason why he should have assumed that it was ok to spend that money in this way? What did you agree to before hand. If things were clear then close/deny access/pull your money out of the account. If it was not clear what your rules for the account were, then tell him exactly and give him a chance to follow those rules. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
engraved2008 Posted February 1, 2011 Author Share Posted February 1, 2011 I love him....see ,he tells litlle lies and thats why i do nto trust him.All his family live beyond their means.One of his brothers bought a house of $ 350.000 and now he cannot pay it.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatsMeeoow Posted February 1, 2011 Share Posted February 1, 2011 I would have a real problem with a guy telling me he took $15 but it was $45. I would not love a guy who tells little lies. What you are faced with is staying with a guy you would like to be a potential partner who doesn't value a dollar the way you do - that's financial disaster and heartache for you. Marriage is hard. Financial stress between couples is real and a huge player in divorce and these are couples who generally agreed the same as far as money principles. Your guy isn't likely to change his habits overnight and if he knows what he can get away with he has no hope of changing them at all. I see this a problem for you and a reason to evaluate this relationship. Good Luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imoutfront Posted February 1, 2011 Share Posted February 1, 2011 Wow! You do realize your BF is just using this "savings account" as his way to mooch off of you, right? You say he always tells "little lies", and that you do not trust him. You cannot have a relationship without trust. You can't continue a relationship with someone who deals with finances so differently from you. Lunch does NOT have to cost $15/day. He needs to start acting like an adult, and prioritize his finances. If I found out my BF spent all of his money on video games and other luxuries, then asked me for lunch money, I'd tell him no. He can go sell one of his games if he needs to. If he was short on cash because of something legitimate, and it didn't happen very often, then of course I'd help him out, as he would for me too. But your situation is nothing like that. I'd really reconsider the relationship if I were you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
engraved2008 Posted February 1, 2011 Author Share Posted February 1, 2011 i THINK HE SHOULD GO TO A FINANCIAL COUNSELOR REALLY.I MEAN HE HAS EXPENSIVE STUFF IN THE HOUSE,FURNITURE,TV,CLOTHING, AND SUCH BUT ALLWAYS IN DEBT. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 1, 2011 Share Posted February 1, 2011 That's major betrayal. If you want to save up for a vacation I would take him off of it. Lke immediately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
engraved2008 Posted February 1, 2011 Author Share Posted February 1, 2011 Wow...im kind of upset ,he was sick for couple of days and his check was short,but...still,he wants to live large and then there is no money for gas and stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeartGoesOn Posted February 1, 2011 Share Posted February 1, 2011 Wow...im kind of upset ,he was sick for couple of days and his check was short,but...still,he wants to live large and then there is no money for gas and stuff. I would be careful about opening a savings account, with a guy that you've only known for a few months. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
markfromark Posted February 1, 2011 Share Posted February 1, 2011 you already stated the answer to your problem in your second sentence: He is a boy. Don't expect him to act like a man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
engraved2008 Posted February 1, 2011 Author Share Posted February 1, 2011 I mean he has his good qualities,i kind of got used to with him and miss him when he is not around....but he needs to grow up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jd1983 Posted February 1, 2011 Share Posted February 1, 2011 Is he now asking you for money for gas and food because he's short on cash? How long have you been together? Do you find yourself constantly paying for things? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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