jimmajam Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 Long time member here. My ex broke up with me about a year and a half ago! I spent most of the first year wasting time on here thinking about it and being depressed ... don't make that same mistake. The sooner you STOP THINKING and STOP TALKING about your breakup, the sooner you'll feel better, get over it and move on. Anyway, I haven't contacted her in well over 6 months. However, she continues to contact me randomly every couple of months. At this point it's more annoying than anything, because I have long accepted it's over, but every time she contacts me it makes me think about her again. It's usually about little stuff too, where I can't believe I'm the first person she thought to contact about it. She pushed me away so hard for a good year and now she's the one who wants to stay in contact. I welcome real contact, real conversations, but these little texts and messages here and there I do not. Is it fair to reply next time and ask her why she's messaging me? Does that sound bad? haha How would you go about asking her what's up? I don't want to sound like a jerk to anyone, even her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
engraved2008 Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 Yeah .I m going through the same thing.He texts every coupel of month to break NC and if i repond he ll call too just to talk and such.Next time i m gonig to ask him calm.What do you really want from me ? You ll get your answer.In my case,if the response is nothing ,or just friends....I ll have to say that the contact makes me think of him again and i would want more....This is my case.....I really do not understand when he contacte me either,one one hand it boosts my ego ,but on the other makes me think of him again... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimmajam Posted January 24, 2011 Author Share Posted January 24, 2011 How long has it been for you? It's been so long for me I'm not even in no contact anymore. If she came at me with a real conversation I'd talk to her like anyone else. My only fear of asking what she wants from me like you suggested is that she'll think I want something from her. She hasn't suggested anything other than contacting me every couple months which seems pointless to me. Maybe some people just can't let go and do stupid things like this to "keep in contact". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 I think it's fair to ask an ex not to contact you. If you want them back it's OK to add 'unless you want to talk about getting back together'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClaraBlue Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 Tell her that you want her to please stop contacting you. That will end it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimmajam Posted January 24, 2011 Author Share Posted January 24, 2011 Tell her that you want her to please stop contacting you. That will end it. It's not that I don't want her to contact me. I just don't want these little messaging every month or two. If she wants to talk regularly or at least have a conversation once or twice a month that would be great. I think I'm going to use what DN said, but substitute getting back together with getting to know each other again or something. A lot of time talking and factors would have to fall into place before I even thought about getting back together. At least talking again would be good though. Thanks for the advice guys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.