Any advice on how I should take things

[kari87]

I have been talking to a girl for over a month and our chemistry as far as talking, hanging out and so on has really clicked. Like we always enjoy hanging out and doing things together. I did go and start things too pushy to begin with and once I realized that I took a step back and so. She would text or try to talk for a good amount of time everyday and we flirt and so on. She has led me on into things and so, but on the other side she doesnt seem to know what she wants. I had a talk with her as far as things and she said that she doesnt know if she is interested in the same way I am interested now, and that she might just want to be friends for now, because she cant tell if it is something as just as friends or something more.

She has been broken up with her ex for like 2-3 months now and he has tried to get back and so, and he has been her first.

I really like this person and value a lot of things in her, but it has put me in a bad spot of not knowing what to do since I do not think I want to lose her.

Any advices? Thanks

[ConfusedDude21]

My friend, do not take it a step further. She is not in a right state of mind- emotionally speaking. Her ex-boyfriend was obviously probably a serious relationship, and trust me, 2-3 months is NOT enough. If she does decide to be with you, it'll be because she'll be using you as a rebound to get over her ex. I have been there, and once she heals, she'll most likely leave. She will like all the attention you give her and she'll need you to be there and it will feel completely right, but although you may fall completely for her she might not for you because she still has feelings for her ex and is confused as to what she wants. If you truly like this girl and want to have a chance at a healthy and lasting relationship, then stay her friend but don't let her lead you on and tell her to stop if she is. She has to heal on her own, with only the support of friends and family..not by using a rebound, so don't be that guy, don't let yourself get used. That's my advice..highly suggest you look into it. Good luck, take care.

[catfeeder]

I'd just tell her that you're clear about your feelings for her, and if she ever decides that she'd like to see you again for dating, she knows how to reach you. Until then, you'll leave her alone while you still think well of her, and wish her the best.

 

Hanging around someone who's not that into you and might possibly still be on the fence about her ex is not a great way to earn respect. Without respect, attraction is out the window.