So I got in touch with the ex, kinda confused but still good.

[o_hopeless_o]

So it seemed appropriate to start this thread in here.

 

 

Anyways. Recently, actually Thursday I got in touch when my ex. Idk if anyone remembers that story but we were together for a year and a half and had a couple fallouts mostly due to either me probably smothering him, him having no time for us, and lack of trust. I think I have only one post from one of those times. Anyways. We broke up in Sept 2009, and I demanded NC early November. I had a very brief exclusive dating type of situation since then, didnt work out of course but thats just some lil info, not really important. Anyways Idk why I called him, yes I initiated contact but I figured I had nothing to lose. I wasnt angry anymore or bitter, ive opened my heart to God so thats probably why I didnt hold onto the hurt for too long. He answered we talk for a good hour and half or two. He sounded surprised but happy nonetheless to hear from me. After this conversation he has been getting in contact loads. He even said lets play a game together online which I didnt mind so I did. He texts me, and calls. I havent really been the one besides the first time to initiate all this.

 

My point to writting this is I know I still love my ex. Its been a short period of time of NC but I feel nothing badly towards him, forgiven him and everything. We had a short Im sorry for what happened and havent spoken about the relationship since then least not bad times. I would like to be with my ex but I am okay with dating others and him so too. But from my knowledge he has told me he isnt dating and hasnt since our break up. Im kinda at a loss at what to do in a situation because I am somewhat curious of his feelings even though I do feel I already know its still the same. I dont really feel like Im trying to gain anything from this situation at this point or know EXACTLY what I want. I mean IDK, do I tell him how I feel? should I ask him? He has brought up alot of inside jokes between us and good memories. Idk if this is just friends, which is okay too I geuss it doesnt bother me but we havent even said much about that either, and probably because its too early. But I do still feel that connection between us, just that strong bond you have with someone you love and care for alot. I feel that there between us.

 

I geuss I wanted some insight, or advice, or maybe some trick questions I know you guys are so good at to really get my mind thinking out of what I really want. Im so confused but calm and content at the same time. This hasnt set me back or anything. Just how I realized I am feeling I geuss I tried to push and lock away those feelings wasnt till recently (a bit before) I called him that I admitted to myself I still loved him even though I didnt want to fearing Id be stupid too or my friends and family why bash me for it But here I am.