lovekare Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 So I'm single, and I have never been truly single since I came out (5 yrs ago). Every girl I have dated had been a friend and it just happened. But now I'm out of college and all of the girls I hang out with are straight (only lesbians I know are my ex and 1 of her friends). I go out to clubs and bars, and always see beautiful girls I'm interested in. I sometimes talk to them, but it always comes out friendly, and they can't ever tell I "like them" like them. Sometimes I think they are flirting with me, but they are just being nice. I guess my gaydar is way off. I don't really look like a lesbian, I'm very girly, and my best friend, who I usually go out with, is notorious for dating every hot guy in town. So how do I hit on girls when I'm out without being weird? How can I make it known I'm looking for girls and not guys? Please help, I've been single for like 7 months now, and have not gone on 1 date, and I live in Miami (these girls are smoking hot!!! its torture, lol). I know I'm pretty, I always get compliments on my looks, but never come-ons from girls, only from guys. I'm getting a little anxious here! How do girls do this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fiishh Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 I want to know the answer to this very question! But I think it is very hard to do this in a "straight" bar, hence why loads of gay people go to gay bars. Sometimes the line between flirting and small talk can be a bit vague in these situations so really I'd just keep on doing what you're doing and try to get to know as many of these women as possible. Since, apparently, 10% of the population is gay or bisexual, the more you get to know, the higher your chances! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JazzTheme Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 It's important to present in a way that makes you noticed by other lesbians. Styling your hair but wearing it short could be one way to do that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovekare Posted January 18, 2011 Author Share Posted January 18, 2011 funny you say that. I actually shaved my head a few months back. not to look gay, I just wanted to give my hair a break from flat irons. Now i wear my hair really short, but still no girls. i'm never going to give up my makeup and heels. lol. and I never go to gay bars because my friends are straight and never want to come with. is there another way to make myself obviously gay. i just dont want to be an "announcer" type of lesbian (those girls that are always talking about how gay they are). should i try online maybe? idk what to do... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaytie Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 You absolutely do not need to change the way you look to attract women. I'm feminine and always have been and I refuse to change to fit some stereotype. Be yourself. Sure many think I'm straight, but I also ensure I get out and join groups that other lesbians attend. Try meet-up groups - they are worldwide. It's a great way to expand your social circle and you will meet people to go to bars with or do other social things with. I happen to know a woman in Ft. Lauderdale that has attended meet-ups so I know they exist there Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UT Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 First and foremost. In order to find someone who will be interested in you, you must present yourself like yourself. Making changes will only add to stereotypes, especially is that stereotype isn't you. Msybe a business card? Name: lovekare Phone nr: ... Email: link removed[/i]"]lovekare@link removed Status: Single lesbian looking for girl to call my own. I really don't know... I'm a gay guy... picking up girls isn't something I do often lol but you could start by going to a gay bar. tell someone they are pretty and ask them to dance. and then see where that eads you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ocean roza91 Posted January 23, 2011 Share Posted January 23, 2011 U should definitely try some gay bars...there are plenty in the ft.lauderdale/ Miami area...my friend goes a lot she's been trying to get me to go out but I haven't yet..the only thing that sucks down here in south FL is that most girls are straight or if they r gay they r usually taken and I agree with being urself when u go out. Just have some fun they will come to u Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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