Tyra Posted January 16, 2011 Share Posted January 16, 2011 Hey so I broke up with my boyfriend over Xmas (it was my decision and it took me 6 months to come to it- it was not a decision I took lightly) and was devastated for weeks, still am. People deal with break ups in different ways. Mine was to retreat and cry, his was to get nasty and send abusive texts etc whihc has been hard to take. As the dust has settled he has still been in contact but asking me silly things like Do I have his shoes? or has he left training stuff at my house? He obviously hasn't as we divided all of our stuff weeks ago. Today I went to lunch with some of my friends and they told me that his facebook status has been about him having sex with another girl. I dont even think he has- hes not even that kind of guy and to publicise it so highly is just stupid... but why is he doing this to me? I deleted him from my facebook immediately and since then hes sent me more abuse over text. I just dont know why hes being so mean? Does anybody have any ideas how to resolve this? Its really been getting to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted January 16, 2011 Share Posted January 16, 2011 One of the biggest mistakes that people make is to assume that anything other people post on Facebook is directed at them. Tell your friends not to tell you what he posts on his. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyra Posted January 16, 2011 Author Share Posted January 16, 2011 Yes, they dont help. The last thing I need to know is what hes doing. Why be so abusive though? Can he not be polite and grown up? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted January 16, 2011 Share Posted January 16, 2011 He is hurt I imagine. He is not behaving well but that is what happens sometimes when people get dumped. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyra Posted January 16, 2011 Author Share Posted January 16, 2011 He got dumped though because he tresat me terribly. This is why I cannot understand his reaction. He should be able to see that he is the reason we broke up!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted January 16, 2011 Share Posted January 16, 2011 Well, if he treated you badly during the relationship it is likely that he would treat you badly after it. I think your best bet is to ignore him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jd1983 Posted January 16, 2011 Share Posted January 16, 2011 I agree. If he's treated you bad while you were in a relationship, I can only imagine the way he would treat you now that you have broken up with him. Perhaps this is the way of healing? In either case, it's best that you move on from your life, and not respond to any of his messages. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonesyjakk Posted January 16, 2011 Share Posted January 16, 2011 when my mum left my dad the only thing he could do to cope was to get drunk and get abusive, he threw a bin through her window, turned up at parties drunk and was a total idiot. the thing is people deal with their emotions differently, when my fiance left me my reaction was to send flowers, write her poems etc which yes is nice but does damage in another way. all i can say to you is get away from him as best you can, tell ur friends whatever they hear, not to tell you as you don't want to know. if the problems pursist seek advice from authorities, don't let him torment you but remember he is probably hurting too, though it is not an excuse for being nasty. I wish you very well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeartGoesOn Posted January 16, 2011 Share Posted January 16, 2011 You have no control over his behaviour, but you do have a choice to ignore it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iBroken Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 As someone guilty behavior I am not proud of after being dumped, I can tell you that he is doing this way because you hurt him and so he is trying to hurt you back so that you guys are on equal pain ground. Its not the smartest move, or best thing to do, but thats why it is happening like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metrogirl Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Why don't you just change your cell number so he can't text anything to you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MakeItCount Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 If this was a situation where you lost feelings for him or whatever, I'd say that this behaviour would be more acceptable as he'd just be hurt and just his way of coping. However, if this is how he acted during the relationship, then you should be happy you're out. I know it's not easy no matter how troublesome the relationship was, but I think he's showing his true colors even more. I think he may go through a period soon where he'll realize what he did and why it ended. Be strong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calblee Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 i wonder what is his side of the story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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