LightbulbSun Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 Hey all, I know I'm a bit late, but I figured that better late than never! I'm going to start, right now, with my resolutions. Here they are 1. I will quit all forums and websites that I feel are sucking the life out of me This is key, because I've been caught in an endless loop of saying "No, it doesn't bother me", and then going back and repeating the same thing (visiting the sites, and complaining about stuff that I've complained about before.) eNotAlone doesn't factor into this, because I believe that this is a very helpful site, and I can receive helpful advice, as well as give it (which makes me feel better.) 2. I will cut down the amount of porn/masturbation I do, to once a day Honestly, I get so horny that I usually masturbate several times a day. However, I believe this messes with my testosterone levels, and makes me feel depressed as a result. Because of this, I masturbate more...and the cycle repeats. I don't need to cut it out completely, but I need to cut it down. 3. I will limit my computer usage, and spend more time getting to know people in the real world This is another biggie, because time spent alone in my apartment is wasted time. If I want friends, and to meet girls, I have to leave my apartment and put myself in uncomfortable social situations. 4. I will no longer "limit myself", based on medical conditions I have Another biggie. I have social anxiety...so I need to get out there and be social. Bang! Anxiety disappears. I am overweight...so I need to exercise more. I have ADD...so I need to spend more time on schoolwork, and less time screwing around. Etc. 5. I will quit all caffeine I honestly believe that caffeine is screwing with my anxiety, and even creating panic attacks where there were none before. Honestly, I need to drink water. That's all the beverage I need. 6. I will look at myself as a "project", not perfect, but not imperfect either All this time beating myself up over not looking like Brad Pitt is ridiculous. So I don't look like Brad...75% of the male population don't. And they get along okay. I need to realize that I am who I am, and that I don't need to apologize for it, fix it, or feel bad because of it. I'm no looker, but that doesn't mean that I'm not worthy of love and friendship. 7. I will read more, and listen to music less I love music, really, I do. However, I spend all of my time on it, and practically no time picking up a book and actually reading it. It took me a month to get through a 700 page book; when I was a teenager, it would have taken me only a couple of days. I just need to read more. What are your New Year's Resolutions? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudgie Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 Those are some awesome resoluations, LightBulb! I'm glad you're not leaving ENA. You mentioned a long while ago about being on a forum full of "sad, older male virgins". Ugh, I can imagine the negativity there. you're right - don't get sucked in!! 1. I'm going to have my surgery and stick with post-op protocol. I'm having my weight loss surgery done (the permanent one) and I'm nervous but I am so ready for it. It will happen in the summer. I need to make sure to eat very little in the beginning (no more than a shot glass) and follow ALL the diets so I can heal and be on the road to a thinner me! I can't wait to be healthy again. 2. I'm going to work hard and do well in school. Well, no surprise here. That's about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightbulbSun Posted January 12, 2011 Author Share Posted January 12, 2011 Those are some awesome resoluations, LightBulb! I'm glad you're not leaving ENA. You mentioned a long while ago about being on a forum full of "sad, older male virgins". Ugh, I can imagine the negativity there. you're right - don't get sucked in!! Thanks Fudgie! And yeah, that forum really sucks the life out of you. That was one of the websites I was referring to as number 1. 1. I'm going to have my surgery and stick with post-op protocol. I'm having my weight loss surgery done (the permanent one) and I'm nervous but I am so ready for it. It will happen in the summer. I need to make sure to eat very little in the beginning (no more than a shot glass) and follow ALL the diets so I can heal and be on the road to a thinner me! I can't wait to be healthy again. 2. I'm going to work hard and do well in school. Well, no surprise here. That's about it. Good luck on your weight loss, and your schoolwork! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stay_home Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 Procrastinate a lot less, and be more stable about getting things that I need to get done, done. To do better keeping up on my prayer and staying focused with my life and not getting sidetracked by things that don't really matter. I don't have a new years resolution that particularly pertains to meeting anyone, but hopefully something decent will come along sometime this year, if not, then that's cool too. I'm trying to up my mass this year so, I'm working out more than last year and making the exercises more intense. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhilliesFan001 Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 I'm going cruelty-free: vegetarian, tossing away my leather and suede boots and any cosmetics that have been tested on animals. I'm setting up a new budget for myself so I don't get buried in debt again, AND... I'm going to start playing tennis Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cm17 Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 I have a series of "goals" rather than resolutions, even though they basically mean the same thing. Typed it out and it 4 pages long! Perhaps too long... but its really an extensive to do list. Hopefully I'll get it done! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stu1066 Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 I started my resolutions the 2 weeks before new year! the reason for my early start was smoking I simply couldnt wait another 2 weeks to stop! that was my first the other was to get back into going to the gym and not using work as an excuse both are still going strong! I have a phobia I need to conquer and also need to cut back on the booze a bit! might save the last 2 for next year or start them when I want too instead of a fixed date like new yrs eve! you have more chance of success if you do things when you really want too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newwave Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 I have two big ones and that is to find a job and find a new man. Jobwise is out of my hands really because I do all I can to find a job. I'm going to try to branch out into other fields though. Guywise is NOT out of my hands. I am going to get rid of the fantasy I have about the guy I want. He's not coming back and quite frankly I deserve better. He's treated me like dirt this whole year and I deserve better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted January 13, 2011 Share Posted January 13, 2011 LBS........you CAN make it out of social anxiety. My husband has a very severe case as well. It started in childhood where he would pass out from anything that produced any anxiety for him and in adulthood it lead to job losses and lack of friends and almost the loss of his family and hospitalization. His basic fear is that people judge him and he is afraid to DEATH of failure. He can not face that in any capacity and it has done a lot in his life to render him helpless for a lot of his life. The only way he is able to deal with it is to actually get out there and do something that he enjoys immensely. It is the only capacity in which he can interact with the world effectively. Find something you REALLY enjoy and do it. Just do it! You will find all sorts of people you have things in common with and then you can shine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightbulbSun Posted January 13, 2011 Author Share Posted January 13, 2011 Yes, that's what I'm going to do. However, I doubt that all my problems will be cured. I probably will struggle with girls, simply because I'm not all that attractive. But I accept that, and I've moved on...as long as I find "someone" who appreciates me for who I am, I'll be happy. She doesn't have to be "princess charming." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VixiT Posted January 13, 2011 Share Posted January 13, 2011 I'm going cruelty-free: vegetarian, tossing away my leather and suede boots and any cosmetics that have been tested on animals. I'm setting up a new budget for myself so I don't get buried in debt again, AND... I'm going to start playing tennis OOOHHH!!! That's awesome!!!! I've been a vegeterian for 4 years and i've been a vegan for almost 2 years and i feel great!!!! GOOD LUCK! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VixiT Posted January 13, 2011 Share Posted January 13, 2011 My resolutions are: 1. I'm gonna get an advanced level in English 2. I'm gonna move down to Thailand 3. I'm gonna keep doing my gym 3 times a week as i started 1 month before NY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightbulbSun Posted January 13, 2011 Author Share Posted January 13, 2011 A few more resolutions: 1. I'm going to quit porn. It makes me feel crappy, and it dehumanizes women. It's not the sexual aspect of it, it's that they treat women like pieces of meat - and I'm not about that. I am a gentleman, I need to imagine myself in scenarios that involve that, rather than "dehumanizing" people. 2. I'm going to cut down on filesharing, and buy more music. Honestly, as a musician, I think it's important to support the artists. 3. I'm going to be a kinder person in general. If someone does something that I don't like, the impulse is to be nasty right back. I'm going to be the better person, and just chalk it down to it being their issue, not mine. 4. I have changed my mind on the coffee bit. However, I'm going to cut it down. 3-5 cups a day is too much. 1 cup a day is perfectly fine. 5. I'm going to start exercising more, and get to know the people at my college's gym. I'm also going to start working out on the treadmill, and start lifting weights. 6. I'm going to learn a sport. Doesn't matter if it's either watching or playing, I'm going to learn the basics and 'try' to play it. It doesn't matter if I suck at it, because who's judging? And I'll get better, that's the thing. 7. I'm going to pay more attention to my cats, and play with them more. 8. I'm going to get a job. Doesn't matter if I have to move hell or high water, I'm going to get a job! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhilliesFan001 Posted January 16, 2011 Share Posted January 16, 2011 OOOHHH!!! That's awesome!!!! I've been a vegeterian for 4 years and i've been a vegan for almost 2 years and i feel great!!!! GOOD LUCK! Thank you! I'm nervous, I've never succeeded at it before so any tips?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocio Posted January 16, 2011 Share Posted January 16, 2011 Mine are so typical: -save more money -keep my home cleaner -lose weight (but if I simply maintain my weight, that`s cool too) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VixiT Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Thank you! I'm nervous, I've never succeeded at it before so any tips?? i'd been trying to become for couple times before i became. That's ok. Just next time when you want to eat meat think by your heart not by the stomach. it should work Don't think "i cannot eat meat anymore" you CAN you DON'T WANT to. And one more.. don't forget that you can cook EVERYTHING by the veg way. So you don't have to refuse any of your favorite dishes, just change them. I have 4 e-books with veg recipes, i would love to share them with you, but all of them are in Russian. But i'm sure you can find a looooot information in English. If you don't know how to replace some products to veg freindly ones just ask Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glowguy Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Mine are actually pretty similar to yours LBS. I've got a lot to work on. 1) Top of the list is to get out and meet people at least once a week and build up to initiating conversations with strangers. I went to a brewery meetup this weekend and am forcing myself to make phone calls every day so some progress. 2) Phase out my coffee drinking to green tea. I've already cut down to 1 - 2 cups a day. This is working well so far. 3) Work out at least three times a week and get outdoors for more hiking. Having trouble with the gym so far. Need more discipline. 4) Quit smoking (again). Unfortunately I picked it back up after my recent breakup. No progress at all with this yet. 5) Cut down on alcohol. I really really love beer, but I did pack on a few more pounds than I realized and have read that it increases anxiety so I think I should keep it to a a few nights a week. 6) Meditate daily and try new relaxation techniques often. I need to do this to help with my social anxiety and stop negative thought patterns. I've been pretty diligent with this one so far and its really helping. 7) Eat healthier and cook more of my own meals. More produce and less meat. I'm slacking on the cooking so far. It's hard in this city since the food is so good. 8) Go to Europe to visit my brother. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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