Is My Friend Gay?

[frewworld]

I have a friend who is going on 17, and he always talks about gay topics, and he often questions if friends are gay, and states "gay activities" they should be doing. I don't know how to take it, because I am gay, but not out. He's outgoing, and attractive. He never has had a girlfriend, but I don't think this is that unusual, and he is kind of rude around them. He talks about girls he'd like to meet and so on, but backs out when confronted by them sexually. I have this feeling he is hiding alot. The other night he started discussing some of his issues (family and personal) without being prompted, which makes it even more confusing. Plus the amount of time that seems to consume talk about same sex (male) small talk. Anyway, I have no romantic feelings towards him, but would like to help him out with his emotions or whatever, but keep our friendship. Should I bring up the question as to whether or not he has feelings towards guys or is this normal? What is going on with him? Any advice???

[sisterlynch]

I had a friend from our old town who was a girl who was very sexually active at a young age, this girl would go around and accuse me of being gay. There was another at my second high school who was also pretty promiscuous.

 

We had a guy friend who said some of what I thought sounded gay : like the rock and roll artists of the eighties wore leather to attract men, and I said no they don't its to attract women and he said oh comon, women don't like leather, everyone knows that gay men like leather.

 

A few weeks or months later he got my husband together on a "date" and came out to him. My husband is pretty understanding of those things.

 

If it seems right do it, just keep a lid on it as much as possible. Does he talk alot about clothes, I've never known a real man to be that much into clothes, or accessories.

[frewworld]

Thanks for the advice. It's a really difficult situation, so i will probably let him take most of the initiative, since i don't want him or others to know I am out at this time. Regarding clothes, I don't think I've ever met a guy or girl with as much clothing as he has, so maybe that's a sign.