Girl paying half the time.

[lana111]

This is no big deal. Just bored and wondering what the fine people at ENA think...

 

 

This guy Ive been seeing for a few months always says stuff like "you are out of control" or "unbelievable" when I pick up the check for something (typically Ill pick up the tabs/expenses half of the time). I know he doesnt literally mean it, of course, but you think he says that bc he thinks its cool that I do, or bc he isnt so comfortable with it...?

[easyguy]

This is a big can of worms that has been debated again and again.

[hexaemeron]

This is no big deal. Just bored and wondering what the fine people at ENA think...

 

 

This guy Ive been seeing for a few months always says stuff like "you are out of control" or "unbelievable" when I pick up the check for something (typically Ill pick up half of the tabs/expenses). I know he doesnt literally mean it, of course, but you think he says that bc he thinks its cool that I do, or bc he isnt so comfortable with it...?

 

Sounds like you landed yourself a "traditional" man.

[lana111]

This is a big can of worms that has been debated again and again.

 

thanks for the opinion ahhaha.

[JusticeLaw9]

There's nothing wrong with covering your own tab, you're a big girl and you make your own money. Not every woman is comfortable with letting the tab get covered by the other half. So I commend you for being independent and thinking outside of the box. Some guys are not used to that, though. But that isn't a bad thing.

[lana111]

i should also say his last girl was sooooo broke. he felt bad an paid for everything, even some of her bills bc she was a struggling student. so maybe he is that traditional man or maybe this is just a big change for him. i dont know which...

[testcase]

I traditionally will cover the tab... but if my date offers to go halves I won't slap her hand away...

[oldenoughtoknow]

This has been becoming more and more the norm since the 60's. But it still isn't a widespread custom. I would definitely say it's because he thinks it's cool. If he wasn't comfortable with it, he would probably be saying something different.

[easyguy]

Whenever I go out with this girl I'm seeing, we either split or she covers the tab... depending on where and how much it was. She's fine with that. I'm fine with that.

[lana111]

thanks for all the input. im not thinking about changing my ways. ive always paid my fair share... just wondering what his comments lead you to believe...

[Atticus90]

I'd cover the tab. Not because I'm sexist or anything, but I think it's respectful and generous to cover it. Guess you can call that traditional, but it's also good manners.

[Tanzi]

My boyfriend pays for everything we ever do together. I have never even bought a round of drinks. It doesn't matter how much I insist or even if I try to hand the money over, he will never let me pay. Recently we had a standoff at the bar where, when I tried to buy some drinks, he told the barman not to take my money. I tried to insist and thrust the money at the barman but by then my boyfriend had got his cash out and again told the barman not to take my money who then promptly took his. It has got to the stage where I have given up trying and that makes me feel bad. Ive told him to at least let me pay for my share sometimes when we go for a meal but he never does. I'm not sure what I should do ... keep on insisting and trying I guess.

 

In answer to your question, it sounds to me, lana, that your guy isn't used to someone offering to pay their share or to pick up the tab. He probably doesn't know how to handle the situation any more than I do.