Overwhelming pain to numbness?

[jamie7]

I was wondering if other dumpees went between these two polar opposite feelings, because I certainly have been experiencing it. I find that I teeter between bawling - I mean the kind of crying you did when you were a kid and couldn't catch a breath, and your heart felt like it was going to break through your chest - and a sense of numbness - that is, feeling very indifferent about the situation.

 

As far as my specific situation goes, you can take a look at my last threat (Getting off the rollercoaster...), but I was just wondering if other dumpees experienced anything similar.

[bluen]

I experienced something similar as I think we all do but it comes in different forms. I melted down mentally to a very unhealthy place and did at times experience numbness. I haven't read your other threads but your obviously feeling this way for a reason as we all do.

[fuddiduddy]

I keep weaving between resentment/anger and baby bawlin' like every two days. I've been doing this for 3 months now, and no matter how hard I try, I still cannot make peace with the chain of events that have transpired.

 

I honestly have NEVER felt such emotional hurt as this in my life. It feels like my heart is slowly about to wither away to dust. It feels worse knowing that the person you love so much (and who at one time loved you), either doesn't have a clue as to how you're hurting or DOESN'T CARE one iota.

 

One of the cruelties of life.

[FootofGod]

One month after my first serious and AMAZING relationship of 2 years, and I'm happy to say neither! I feel amazing most of the times. Mornings are bad (until i get my coffee lol), but I feel totally myself. I do everything I wanted to with her... without her. My life is great, and if she really doesn't want me to share it with her, it's her loss. I'm not slowing up - I might even speed up with the loss of weight!

[hours]

Yes, I fluctuate between feeling like I've been shot through the chest with a canonball and/or run over by a mac truck. It's been two years since the break up/nearly 4 months NC. We were together 15 years. I hope to start feeling something else soon.

[texaslove]

I have days where the hurt is little inside. People who I work with and family say I look as though I am doing better. Well, I am, but that doesn't mean I am doing well. There is always a huge weight sitting inside right on my heart but to the outside world I have been holding it together and not crying a tthe drop of a dime.

 

Yesterday I was good. Then I got into my car and when I got home, parked, and started crying non stop. I was screaming, kicking, crying, throwing a tantrum like iwas a 4 yr old kid. Somedays I just have to let it out. It was great to release those tears I had been holding back all week.

[Im Steph]

I wouldn't say I ever have a numb feeling. But I definitely feel like I have hit bottom several times in the last month since he broke up with me after a 6 year relationship. Then I might start to feel some slight improvement in my attitude, a bit of hope for the future and my ability to survive without him. My friends tell me how strong I seem and that I seem to be doing well, and sometimes, I actually do feel that way when I am with them. But back on my own, I have another melt-down, with the uncontrolled crying and complete despair about not having my ex to rely on anymore. It's amazing how strong the actual physical feelings are sometimes, absolutely like being "shot through the chest with a cannonball," or punched in the solar plexus. I have had panic/anxiety problems in the past and it felt like this too, but that was about what I can only describe as an existential crisis. The break up has brought all that up again too, and only seems to add to everything.

[jimmajam]

I was wondering if other dumpees went between these two polar opposite feelings, because I certainly have been experiencing it. I find that I teeter between bawling - I mean the kind of crying you did when you were a kid and couldn't catch a breath, and your heart felt like it was going to break through your chest - and a sense of numbness - that is, feeling very indifferent about the situation.

 

As far as my specific situation goes, you can take a look at my last threat (Getting off the rollercoaster...), but I was just wondering if other dumpees experienced anything similar.

 

Very common. The bad news is personally, I liked the pain stage way more than the numbness stage. I am still in the numbness stage and it's been about 5 months - I hate it. I don't get excited about anything, I have no emotion for anything or anyone, I have no motivation ... I'm just numb. I've been getting better the last couple of months, but it's still a struggle.

[jamie7]

Very common. The bad news is personally, I liked the pain stage way more than the numbness stage. I am still in the numbness stage and it's been about 5 months - I hate it. I don't get excited about anything, I have no emotion for anything or anyone, I have no motivation ... I'm just numb. I've been getting better the last couple of months, but it's still a struggle.

 

I know what you mean. When I experience the numbness, I get very frustrated. I am usually very excited and enthusiastic about things, and when I'm not I feel very unlike myself. Also, I am not attracted to people I know I normally would be. It's very strange.

 

I can't help but wonder if he is experiencing the same things...