No1 Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 It has been 7months, give or take a few days since the break up. And I have been asking myself if "Moving On" and "Getting Over" your X different. I have moved on. Since the break up, I have been going to the gym, getting back to my normal life since my X. I date, been seeing this good girl, I work out, I play baseball, been flying a lot more, and I am "happy" I am positive about my outlook in life and I know that my life is just fine and will be fine without my X in it. I can live a happy life without her. Now.. I came to realize that I am not over my X. Ever since we met 4 years ago, I have thought of her every single day. We dont stay in contact often, if we do she initiates the contact via text message and its maybe once a month, but we still stay in contact. She just recently sent me a $1000 camera in the mail with a short note saying thank you for all you have done for me. Now, I have accepted its over. We are not getting back and I would love to have her not be in my life. But I still think about her. I am thinking maybe we stay in contact because who knows what the future holds. I like to think that there is a 100% chance we will never ever get back, but in reality as long as we are alive, there is always going to be a chance and maybe I am wishing that one day perhaps in a few years we do eventually find eachother again. It has happened before. So is it possible to move on without being over someone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Le MX5 Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 Moving on, to me, means you don't try to pursue a relationship anymore, getting over means you don't think or care about them anymore. So, if you share my definition of moving on and getting over, yes, you can move on without being over someone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenna-is-here Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 I am not sure how you define being over someone...does it mean you have no more desire for the two of you to get together? Or you have no hope or you have no interest? Does it mean you get to such a point of indifference they have the same impact on you as a stranger at the grocery store? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenna-is-here Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 Moving on, to me, means you don't try to pursue a relationship anymore, getting over means you don't think or care about them anymore. So, if you share my definition of moving on and getting over, yes, you can move on without being over someone. Yes, ikeith, nicely said! I guess that is what I was eventually trying to get to! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fLuiD Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 I think these two go hand in hand. You have to get over someone before you can move on. Getting over them is getting them out of your system. No more thinking of them, wanting to be with them, missing them, etc. Moving on is when you start dating, get into other relationships, or simply carry on with the rest of your life without them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanzi Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 I think you have described perfectly the difference between moving on and being truly over your ex. Moving on is all part of a healing journey and the further along we go the easier it gets and the happier we become. If you keep on moving eventually you will get to a stage where you will be completely over your ex and at that stage you will be indifferent to the contact you have and the hope you still harbour as regards getting back together will no longer exist. You may not be at the end of the road yet but you are certainly getting there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanzi Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 I am not sure how you define being over someone...does it mean you have no more desire for the two of you to get together? Or you have no hope or you have no interest? Does it mean you get to such a point of indifference they have the same impact on you as a stranger at the grocery store? I would definitely say the latter. Basically they stop being the centre of your world and the point of all your focus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
No1 Posted June 9, 2010 Author Share Posted June 9, 2010 The thing is, I cant pursue her. It would make me look weak, after all, she is the one that broke up with me, and even tho I want to forget about her. Truth is, I love her still and she loves me. Just at a point in our lives that our paths dont join. Now I have moved on with my life. Running on my own path, I can live just fine without her. But there is that little question in my head wondering if she will ever come looking for me. Its all. I am not over her, but over the break up and moving on. I do not contact her, she knows talking on the phone hurts me. She knows I am having fun and living my own life. Just hurts knowing I have to continue on without her when I know a life with her would be amazing. Who knows, a few years from now. Our paths may cross again, but its going to have to be her that seeks me out. Anyone else in this same problem. Moved on, but not over them? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silversoul Posted January 1, 2014 Share Posted January 1, 2014 hey, three years after what happened to your situation? did you get back together? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
No1 Posted January 1, 2014 Author Share Posted January 1, 2014 No we did not. She is happy where she is and I am happy where I am. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
varkolak Posted January 7, 2014 Share Posted January 7, 2014 Moving on - Accepting that he/she will not love you again romantically, and you are friendzoned for life, even though you are open to having something romantic with him/her again in the future, they are not... thats if you chose the friendship route Getting over the ex - You don't WANT to get back together with him/her and could care less if you stay friends or not. My opinion on the difference between the two. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
No1 Posted January 8, 2014 Author Share Posted January 8, 2014 varkolak.... good way of looking at it.. I think its still a good question to ask Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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