He still has NOT changed his address!!!!!

[jazzbarrett]

Prior to our breakup, my ex and I bought some items together that, when we broke up, he rudely stated he was keeping to himself. The items, according to the company, were going to be shipped in installments and even though my name is also on the purchasing account, he is the one paying for it, so I don't really care that he is keeping the stuff.

 

What pisses me off is that, after 4 months of having been broken up, and him moved out, he still has not changed his address. I am still receiving mail from him from this company. And it is not post office mail, it is the UPS guy knocking at my door asking for a signature. I have not answered the door because a) I do not want to sign for items I have not paid for and b) I do not want to create a situation where he and I have to meet sometime for me to give him his stuff.

 

My question is why, after 4 months of NC, has he not changed his address??? I know he has got to be realizing stuff is not going to his new address and I know he keeps up on his accounts and must be aware that the items are being shipped back because no one is signing for them at my address. Is this some sick way of him wanting me to contact him? Is he trying to create a situation where we meet? Or is he (this I do not believe to be true at all, but a friend suggested it) trying to give me my half of what we initially, prior to NC after breakup, agreed on what I would keep?

 

I honestly do not want to keep avoiding the UPS guy, but it doesn't seem like he's going to be changing his info any time soon. What should I do?

[CatsMeeoow]

Firstly - is your name still on the account?

 

If shipments are being sent and returned some companies charge for that... shipping is expensive. You could be racking up debt unaware. I have no idea why a company is still shipping you items after you keep returning them unless you are under a contract of some sorts. If they can't track him down but have an address for you you become solely responsible.

 

I would call the company and inquire about the repeated shipments being sent to you. Are you being billed? Is there an outstanding balance with your name on it? How do you get your name removed? Provide a forwarding address for your ex?

 

Then I would contact your ex and inform him of the situation in a polite manner.

 

I know you do not want to contact your ex but you are being irresponsible.

 

If you were with him long enough to create joint accounts then you need to grow up and resolve them like an adult. This seems to me more childish behavior than truly just wanting to stay NC.

[shes2smart]

Have you called the company the items were ordered from?

 

Depending on how the account was set up, if your name is on it he may not be able to change the shipping information OR you may both need to request that it be done.

 

Both my name and my husband's name are on our cell phone account...but, they have him down as the primary account holder. As such, I can't just contact them and change the calling plan or billing address or anything.

 

You need to deal with this head on and stop avoiding. First thing to do (if you haven't already) would be to call the company that's sending the items and see what power/authority you have on the account. You may find that you have the sole authority to make changes and/or close the account. If you can close it, that's what I'd do. He can re-order the stuff in his own name. But, really, until you know more about how the account is set up, I'd avoid jumping to conclusions about his intentions or reading anything into this.

 

If you have contacted the company, what did they say?

[FrenchFries]

Call the company and stop the shipments. Let them know the person who placed the orders no longer resides at that address.