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13 years...


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I have been wanting to kill myself for 13 years. i promised myself i wouldn't do it until i was 42, but even on anti-depressants and sleeping medicines, i still wish I could do it now. i have been on several different drugs but i dream too much. that's what plagues me. i dream of the past constantly. it's horrifying. I wake up screaming, crying, sweating; you name it, i've woken up with it. i've even woken up sweating and shivering. i apparently move a lot cuz my mattress is always about a foot from where it should be but in a sleep study i was completely still.


i'm scared of my dreams and i just want to escape them. please help

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I want to kill myself just as well, Life is like a Game and if you take yourself out of the Game before you make it to the next level, you will miss out on any tokens that you could have gotten to carry yourself to stage 3 4 5 and 6. in other words, dont miss out on your True pourpose in life because you feel you dont deserve to live anymore

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we have messed with the drugs for about 5 years. no matter how many sleeping pils i take, i can only sleep 4 hours at most at night. even with 12 hour ambien. the doctor was unimpressed with me 4 hours of straight sleep, thougb my sleep study showed nothing cuz i freaked. they are scaryyyyy!!!! i just want to stop dreaming! i have had to stay up for 3 days straight cuz i was so afraid of my dreams.

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Please don't kill yourself. At least you are still able to wake up from the terrible dream you have. I think those who committed suicide wish their body could wake up, because they find themselves in another dimesion or world that is terrifying. Do you really want to take the chance to find out? There is always hope as long as you're still breathing. Don't give up hope.

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it's freaky to read that your mattress moved about a feet but the sleep study say that u r still. Do they videotape it? Is it only in your mind??

What is your dream about? Do you have a traumatic experience? Bad relationship? Family?

I believe you that u r sane.

I can't imagine not being able to sleep for 13 yrs. If you had to stay up for 3 days straight, how do you work the next day? Do you go to school, work or what?

If I can't sleep because of depression, I just make myself really, really tired, until I can not stay awake anymore.

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Hi Piper,




Please never do that. PLEASE. There are ways out of anything. Please don't ever give up! What helps me is to get away from myself and isolation.Try to go to a place where you can help others. It will help you. It will bring you back to reality. I used to volunteer at an orphanage. And after an hour of helping the kids I always felt great because I was able to forget myself. There are so many people in this world who need you. Reach out to them and you will love yourself for it. You are so much greater than you know. I'm pulling for you. Don't do anything extreme no matter what. We all at one time or another get sick of life. But you don't know about tomorrow.Don't forget prayer. Just pray with an honest heart and I promise you things will get better! Promise!


I'm on your side,



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You'v been hurt in the past? And thats what you dream about?


Did you consider to drop all the pills and medicine? As you said, you are not "crazy", you could make it.


Is there someone who you could talk to and be there for you, when needed?

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