Getting back on track

[kboykb]

Hola! Just need a bit of advice for my future here. Back in October I got a girl pregnant - she aborted it in December. This implanted a slight seed of fear in me. The reason is because she was on birth control, I wore a condom that did not break, and I washed up immediately afterwards.

 

I'm always careful, and safe, and to this day I have no idea how it happened. She wasn't the right girl - a fling of sorts, and the thought of having a baby with someone that I had no real mental or physical attraction with was agonizing. Needless to say it may be some sort of message from higher above, or karma biting at me (as I did have my fun during the college years). I can no longer shake my head at the multitude of pregnant friends that I have, as I was once in their same position.

 

This has actually led me to shut myself off from girls intimately and even mentally. I think I have had sex once or twice and met one girl since October, and even then it just felt off. At first I thought I was avoiding a relationship, but now I see there's a real problem here.

 

The reason for this is because I really want to do something with my future. I'm currently taking some classes as a pre-med and intend to make it into medical school. I don't want anything to deter me from this path, but at the same time by doing this I'm shutting myself off from girls that like me..

 

 

[Dragunov-21]

If she really was on BC, and you used a condom that was not compromised, I would suggest a more likely possibility to be that perhaps it wasn't yours? Especially if she was, as you say, a fling?

 

Possible?

[newwave]

This is why I've become anti having sex unless it's a serious relationship. I've known people on birth control (even sterlization) who became pregnant or caused a pregnancy. I would abstain until you meet the right one. Either that or engage in other sexual activities that don't cause pregnancies.

[kboykb]

I thought that too Dragunov - but if it wasn't mine she really is a good actress.. I'm just glad it's over.

 

newwave I understand where you're coming from - and I may do the same thing. I just don't think it's worth it anymore, unless it's with someone I really care about.

 

Maybe that's what I was supposed to get from all of this. I'm going to have to open myself back up to females

[Dragunov-21]

I think you may be right.

 

Of course, be careful, thinking even of the occasional risks my first gf and I took makes me cringe.

 

But there is a happy medium between fun and safety, just find yours.