Atticus90 Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 im so happy right now, words cannot even explain this feeling. we had a talk on the phone earlier and she was saying that she would like to get back together with me but she said she wanted me to change because she thought i was controlling and stuff. also she says she doesn't know how she can do it because her whole family basically hates me. i could tell her to tell them all the things she said was just out and anger and not true but her family isnt as understanding. how could she talk to her family and try to get them to accept me back? im going over her house on tuesday and were gonna have a 1on1 talk in person and she said she'll give me an answer then because she doesn't want to over the phone. she said no promisses, but she wants to grasp the feeling when she sees me and all that stuff. i told her i changed. sorta hard for her to believe it, but i think were both trying to change because she was the same way. being away from her so long gave me time to be alone for the first time in a while and sort of forced myself to changed cause i really had no choice in the matter. now my question how can she convince her family to accept me? any witty sayings? any of that stuff because she says she cant do a relationship if she constantly has to hide the fact that we're together and she would like their acceptance. i asked her if having my hopes up was a mistake and she said no so yeah right now i just need some advice on how to go about this. and i want to give her advice on what to say to her parents but i dont know what to say so if you have any things she could say please tell me. im real happy so only give me positive advice.. no negatives please cause i can't really deal with that at this time. thank you1 Link to comment
hers Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 glad to see you didn't off yourself. you can't get her to convince her family to accept you. and you can't just tell her you've changed. you have to show her. Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 31, 2010 Author Share Posted May 31, 2010 that's what im saying i feel i shouldn't have to show her parents this. i should be showing her how ive changed. but she says she wants her parents to accept me, so id like to know what she could say or do to make that happen. i admit, i'd like to live a life without a motherinlaw or fatherinlaw hateing me.. i could deal with it, but i would like for everyone to get along. Link to comment
woodc5 Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 We don't know why exactly her parents dislike you, whether it be solely from the break up or a combination of things, but actions speak louder than words. If you want them to like and accept you, you have to make their daughter happy and show them your a decent guy. She can't just make them like you. Link to comment
Miss Firecracker Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 Atticus, She can't do anything to make them accept you. That will be up to you. Just take it one day at a time. Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 31, 2010 Author Share Posted May 31, 2010 We don't know why exactly her parents dislike you, whether it be solely from the break up or a combination of things, but actions speak louder than words. If you want them to like and accept you, you have to make their daughter happy and show them your a decent guy. She can't just make them like you. I can understand that. They don't like me, because I got her daughter knocked up and they think I'm a deadbeat, which I'm not. The breakup was bad, so I'm sure she said a lot of bad things about me that weren't true; to her parents. I've been with her for almost 5 years and they thought I was a bad guy from day 1. Apart of me think that's just there way and they'll always be like that towards me, but I gotta try... Atticus, She can't do anything to make them accept you. That will be up to you. Just take it one day at a time. Sure she could. Probably not accept me 100%, but she can disregard anything she has been saying about me since the breakup and just move on from there. Right? Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 They don't like me, because I got her daughter knocked up and they think I'm a deadbeat, they thought I was a bad guy from day 1. I think it will take a lot to change their minds if they have had that view of you since "day one". Somehow YOU will have to prove to them that you are not a deadbeat. No-one else can do that for you. Link to comment
woodc5 Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 I can understand that. They don't like me, because I got her daughter knocked up and they think I'm a deadbeat, which I'm not. The breakup was bad, so I'm sure she said a lot of bad things about me that weren't true; to her parents. I've been with her for almost 5 years and they thought I was a bad guy from day 1. Apart of me think that's just there way and they'll always be like that towards me, but I gotta try... Sure she could. Probably not accept me 100%, but she can disregard anything she has been saying about me since the breakup and just move on from there. Right? Put yourself in a similar situation. If you had an impression of someone for years, would it matter much if someone all of a sudden said "that person isn't so bad"? Probably not. They'd have to prove they aren't so bad, right? Do your best to prove to them you aren't a deadbeat. Take care of their daughter and prove your worth. Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 31, 2010 Author Share Posted May 31, 2010 she said this today when i asked her about everything in facebook i do love you with all my heart and soul more than the world. but i just dont know if i can be with you. its hard to understand. idk why either. maybe i need counseling.. What does that mean? Link to comment
iBroken Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 It means that she is having doubts about trying again - she is confused Sorry Link to comment
wheatgrass82 Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 glad to see you didn't off yourself. . lol... yes.. i am also glad. i totally think you could say something to her parents .. i think you should.. it can't hurt.. but it really could help.. if you do get that chance... ask to speak to her parents one on one.... you don't need to involve her.. make it bt you and the 'rents. speak from the heart.... let them know you're accountable for your actions.....everybody makes mistakes.. ppl grow up and ppl mature... act mature and kind.. and understanding.. no need to be smart.. if u really dig this girll..... do what you can to make it happen... no gifts or anything.. just a private matter... bt you and her olds'. allow them to voice their concerns and be prepared to take it.. it may help! it amy not.. but at least you tried ! x Link to comment
hers Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 It means just b/c you love someone doesn't mean you're a good match. Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 31, 2010 Author Share Posted May 31, 2010 It means just b/c you love someone doesn't mean you're a good match. sigh.. guess im not suprised... Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 31, 2010 Author Share Posted May 31, 2010 "if it's to good to be true, it most likely is" I'll always go by that. Just talked to her. Apparently I interupted her putting pictures on her wall and she got pissed and said she doesn't want to talk to me. and she said ok my answer is no. dont come over tomorrow. over a phone call.. ha, wonder what she was really doing.. i need to move on. this is ridiculous. its childish and frankly.. just pathetic. she's a drop in the water... im no longer suicidal or anything like that. i see what kind of person she is and it makes me happier that im happier than she is. she can be miserable to herself cause i want no part in it. Link to comment
wheatgrass82 Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 AWESOME AWESOME.. this is ... AWESOME!!! if she loves herself so much... she can have herself.. exactamundo dude! xx Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 31, 2010 Author Share Posted May 31, 2010 AWESOME AWESOME.. this is ... AWESOME!!! if she loves herself so much... she can have herself.. exactamundo dude! xx yeah really. shes to promiscuous anyways. i love sex as much as the next person, but damn, she'll go out of her way to get it from any man. i see many stds in her future. many problems. i honestly hope she hits rock bottom. i wait for the day she begs for me back and i just flat out laugh in her face and say no. i know she will to. i know her all to well. i wont let her have to satisfaction of getting her fix on these men and coming back to me knowing id be waiting cause i wont be... ha im only 20 and i feel like im gettin to old for this high school puppy love f me over crap lol. Link to comment
wheatgrass82 Posted May 31, 2010 Share Posted May 31, 2010 promiscusous is not good. not good for relationships. call me old fashioned.. one person is enough!! if you want to have sex with more than one person.... just get your partner to be someone else.. the options are never ending... good for you to be over this stuff. you sound like a tough cookie... you seem to be fine... good to know. x Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted June 1, 2010 Author Share Posted June 1, 2010 gotta admit something tho. i do indeed miss the sex. she did everything i wanted her to do when it came to that.. anyways. now that im calmed down. i wish her a happy life. i think it'll be difficult because of her way of thinking, but because of my son, i want her to be happy. i think im over her. i do have a few times during the day when i miss her, but im certainly doing better than i was on day 1 of breakup. i think in another month of no contact, i think i'll be fully healed. 4 - 6 months til im ready to date again. Link to comment
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