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Looking at photos of your ex and the new flame


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So, after having made it this far, 15 months, I finally saw photos of my ex and the guy she left me for. She had sent a f.b friend request the other day (she has been in limited contact the last week - no idea why), and I couldn't help myself.

 

I didn't enlarge any of the thumbnails, but I saw enough (there were only about 3 photos of them together on her whole page, all from something more than a year ago - strange). To be honest, maybe it was the best thing I could have done. I scrolled through her wall (I hate the whole fb thing - I dont have anything on my page, not even a photo), and saw that she is basically a totally different person. Yes, it made me feel incredibly insignificant, a little jealous, and that the 3.5 years she was in my life were meaningless, but maybe that's how I need to view what her and I had for a while.

 

I wont be back again, certainly not to check on 'updates', but maybe seeing that the past year of my life did actually happen, and not just being somewhat deluded, will help me in ultimately moving on.

 

All this comes to me now, just as she has reopened the lines of communication!

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I wouldn't engage her at all. You're doing fine without her, and I worry that communicating with her again will only lead down a bad path.

 

But don't look at those 3.5 years as meaningless. They weren't. You learned a lot about herself, and ultimately I'm guessing you really enjoyed those years with her. That time part part of the lives of both of you.

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Believe me, I wont be having much if anything to do with her. Its become clear that things on her page coincide with the times she contacted me - in other words every time she contacted me, its obvious things were happening with him (fights or whatever).

 

I'm nobody's backup plan or emotional outlet when things go crap.

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Believe me, I wont be having much if anything to do with her. Its become clear that things on her page coincide with the times she contacted me - in other words every time she contacted me, its obvious things were happening with him (fights or whatever).

 

I'm nobody's backup plan or emotional outlet when things go crap.

 

That's a good way too look at it. Do what you think is right uj2004.

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