Shortpants Posted May 26, 2010 Share Posted May 26, 2010 Feeling a little funny this morning... Today is Littlepants' first field trip with daycare to a local kid's museum. On the one hand I am very happy that her daycare does things like this with the younger toddlers, and all the caretakers are great over there and I know they will all have a great time... BUT on the other hand I am sad that someone else will be taking her to her first museum, without me, and I'm scared that something will "happen" while they are away from the safe haven of the daycare center. I have been like this since LP was born. I don't trust anyone else to watch her (haven't left her with a babysitter yet... ever... not even family), even her own father has only had her alone twice since she was born. I know I'm going to be a basket case until I pick her up this afternoon. How do I get over this overwhelming feeling that I can't protect her when I'm not there? The silliest thing is that I know in my head that everything will be ok, but my heart sinks to the bottom of my shoes just thinking about her being out and about without me watching. It's such a strange combination of sadness at missing out on all her firsts due to working full time and having her in daycare, and an unreasonable fear that something will happen "because I'm not here". Ugh, I hate this feeling but I can't seem to get over it. I though it would lessen as she got older, but if anything it has gotten worse. She is my first child, when I thought I would never have children, so I tend to be terribly overprotective. And more than likely she will be my only child (unless I can convince daddy to have another, but I'm creeping up on 40, so I don't know if it will happen before I deem myself "too old") It would destroy me if anything happened to her, and I know how many creepers are out there in this sick world of ours. I try not to let the mind monsters get the best of me, but sometimes I just can't help it! Heeeeellllllpppppp, please tell me it will be ok and I'm being silly. I honestly think I'm more sad than scared, I have missed so many of her milestones and it breaks my heart to think I'm going to miss another one. Link to comment
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