what to do? NC?

[missthinkpink]

My boyfriend broke up with me over a year ago now. We'd been together for two and a half years, since we were 17 and came to University together. We constantly argued and I was just a nightmare girlfriend to be honest and he just didn't try hard enough.

 

I wanted to cut off all contact when we broke up but he didn't want that so we stayed friends and it was really great. We go out for drinks and meals together about once or twice a month and talk fine.

 

At the start of the break up i struggled with my feelings and whenever i saw him when i was out drinking it always ended up with me telling him i still loved him etc etc.

 

However, the past couple of months i felt i'd moved on finally and we were better friends than ever and it was really working in that sense.

 

Then a couple of weeks ago, we were both out and very drunk. Somehow we ended up kissing - i initiated it - for quite a while. We then talked afterwards with him saying it wasn't fair to go back there and he said it couldnt just happen with no consequences and because it was me it would always mean something more.

 

We then went our separate ways and i didn't see him again until the end of the night. I tried to talk to him but my friends wouldn't let me and tried to get me to go home. I can barely remember what we spoke about and in the end we both went home.

 

I haven't had a proper chance to talk to him since, nor do i know if it's a good idea. I apologised to him the day after online and he just said that it was ok. I've only texted him once since about something trivial and it got to the point where things were coming up on his facebook that got to me, to do with other girls so i thought best to delete him as a friend on there, as petty as that is i felt i didn't have a choice if i wanted to get over things.

 

He texted me the next day asking if i'd deleted him and i said yes i had and i just thought it was for the best for me at the moment but that it didn't mean i didn't want to not be friends with him and that it was only facebook.

 

I've been finding it really hard not talking to him lately as he was one of my best friends and knows more about me than anyone else. Last night i texted him apologising for deleting him and that i found it harder than seeing the things on facebook and that it was worth being friends with him even if it hurt me a bit. i just ended it with 'i hope you're okay and then he didn't text back.

 

I just don't know what to do reallly. Any advice at all would be great!

[Sonicxman]

Go NC. He has moved on, I think it's time to let him go. Stay away from facebook, unless your willing to sit back and watch for things that might be said, done and photos you might see of him with others. I think you did your self a good service by letting him go, and unfriending him on facebook. Tell your friends, that your going to need their support for the next couple months. Remove anything that reminds you of him from your life, dont delete, throw away or whatever, just put it away. Dont get drunk again and put yourself in the same situation again. Believe me when I say having sex with an Ex is the worst thing you can do, as far as healing is concerned. So your not reminded by him, it's going take time to heal. Good luck.