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Just when I thought I had ended it...


DCed

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Hi everyone,

 

Yes, I'm afraid it's another "OMG I have a crush on my straight friend" thread, but I seriously need help. And since I will never "come out" to any of my friends or family, I have no homosexual friends to discuss this with.

 

Ok, I used to have a massive crush on one of my friends (let's call him J) who is the same age as me (17), and I would feel happy whenever I was with him, sad when he wasn't around, and feel really good every time he jokingly put his arm around me, etc, but he was straight, so I bundled up my feelings for him and put them away, so that I could stop having a crush that would go nowhere and continue on with my life. Also, he is extremely good friends with my brother too, even though my brother is 2 yeas older. I'm pretty sure he thinks I am homosexual, or at least bisexual. This was all 2 months or so ago, then I didn't see him for a while, because I was being socially reclusive.

 

But recently, J has been hanging around me more than my brother every time he comes around, and is starting to put his arms around me "jokingly", etc, more and more. The fact that every time he sleeps over at our house, he sleeps in my double bed with me doesn't help either. He has been slipping in comments like "we could do it, nobody has to know" quickly and subtly, and I'm not sure if he is joking or not. And trust me, I know when he is joking or not. The most recent sleep over with him, he started "jokingly" putting his arms around me for longer than usual, spooning, etc. He told me to put on the song "Every time we touch" by Cascada, and started to sing to it when he was in my room, which is weird for him because he is only into death metal. He made another comment in the morning which I'm not sure he is joking or not, "you're my type, you're petite" (because I'm skinnier than him, and he is pretty muscly). He has also been making comments about how someone can turn gay from events in their life, as well as being born gay, which seems like a strange topic to talk about.

 

But it's all confusing, because I know that J has had sex with girls, and even has a girlfriend. It could be that he is horny because he hasn't had sex with his girlfriend for a couple of months, but that seems like a pretty stupid reason, but he could be bisexual, so I don't know. And it's annoying because I am getting my crush back on for him. I don't know if my perspective is clouded by my attraction to him or not.

 

So the questions: What should I do about it?

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He doesn't sound straight to me. Those are some heavy, not-so subtle signals coming from him! Maybe he hasn't labelled himself as homosexual or bisexual, but he is certainly curious and sounds like he's up for experimentation. It doesn't really matter who he has had sex with in the past. A guy having sex with a female doesn't make him straight.

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