Jeen Posted May 22, 2010 Share Posted May 22, 2010 Well where do I start! Me and my ex husband bought a home when we got married we spend the years we were married making it a home we both enjoyed. It was a place we both loved, after our divorce I stayed on in this home and payed my ex the difference to compensate him for his investment in this home, money wise and time spent making it a home. Since then I move myself just a bit more than a year ago and rented the place out to people I know very well. A few months back I decided to sell the place for a charity that is close to my heart did not receive gov. funding this year and could use the money. I never even thought of my ex while making this decision. Well this week his mom visited me and “I am still very close to his mom and dad” said if I am going to sell the place my ex “her son” is also interested in buying the place, it is a good property but nothing special if you are looking at the property market. He got married a year after our divorce and have a family and lives in a home just short from being a castle. Why would he want our old home? To be honest I don’t want to sell it to him. I know I’m not his care taker or wife anymore but I feel it may be out of some sentimental value he is interested in buying it back. I feel deep down in my heart this will not be a good decision to sell it to him for how would it look and feel to his wife at this point, when he do get to buy it. I’m really having a hard time figuring out what to do! I don’t want to hurt him by saying no but still I feel it will not be good for his marriage, or how this may look to his wife, it feels like I’m sabotaging his family by wanting to sell the place, opening old feelings that we all could do without. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazyaboutdogs Posted May 22, 2010 Share Posted May 22, 2010 Perhaps he is looking at it as an investment rather than for any sentimental reasons. At any rate, his marriage is not your problem. Selling the house to him is not interfering in his marriage because this is a simple business arrangement. It is up to him to discuss this with his wife and see if she is okay with it. Just view your ex as a potential buyer but make sure he gives you a fair and competitive price. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lavenderdove Posted May 22, 2010 Share Posted May 22, 2010 First, it is not your job to worry about his current marriage. He's a grown man and can and should make those decisions himself. Perhaps he knows it's a good house and wants to use it as a rental to someone else, or thinks it's a good business investment, or maybe he wants to move his mother into it or some other relative or friend. As they say, his money is just as green as anyone else's and it needs to be looked at as a business transaction, where you get the most money possible for the house from whichever buyer is willing to pay the best price. If your concern is the charity, then ask him to pay a high price for the house, and the charity gets more money! Who cares what your ex does with it, your goal was to sell it for money for the charity. And you really do need to stay totally out of worrying about his marriage... that is between him and his wife, and not healthy for you to get involved in their affairs at all, or patronize them by thinking you should protect them from themselves or their own decisions... they're adults and need to be treated that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catfeeder Posted May 22, 2010 Share Posted May 22, 2010 Put the house on the market for a reasonable price. If ex puts in an offer to buy at that price, then he's the buyer and can work with your agent to complete the sale. If not, then that settles it either way. A qualified buyer who completes the deal is all you need to know about 'who' the buyer is. Place your focus on where you're moving TO, and don't bog yourself down with looking back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeen Posted May 22, 2010 Author Share Posted May 22, 2010 Apparently "hearsay" he is willing to double the price it will be listed for, had a talk with his lawyer this afternoon at a BBQ. Well for that price I'm not going to ask any more questions. Thanks for everyones input. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonasWaingaro Posted May 22, 2010 Share Posted May 22, 2010 Apparently "hearsay" he is willing to double the price it will be listed for, had a talk with his lawyer this afternoon at a BBQ. Well for that price I'm not going to ask any more questions. Thanks for everyones input. Take the money and walk away! You can give more proceeds to the charity! You're awesome Jeen, don't worry about selling it him at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lavenderdove Posted May 23, 2010 Share Posted May 23, 2010 Excellent! Take the money and run! How lovely that the charity will be getting so much more money. Or perhaps you should take some of that money and do something fun/nice for yourself! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostandhurt Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 First of all that is an extremely generous gift you are making to that charity. Not many people would do such a thing. Good for you! In the end the charity will do that much better so it will be one more good thing to come out of your marriage to him. Are you sure he didn't bury something in the backyard he wants to keep a secret? oooh what if it is a chest full of money! or a body! LOL Your one hell of a generous woman Jeen Lost Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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