Atticus90 Posted May 21, 2010 Share Posted May 21, 2010 I know, I make a lot of threads bout my ex, but when you have no one else to turn to, ENA is pretty much my soundboard. Anyways.. My ex keeps trying to come in contact with me. I don't know why though. She's mean and ruthless one minute, then she calls me bawling her eyes out saying "I want you back". then goes to say "But I can't, you hurt me to much. You lied to much to me, yada yada yada". I say to her "Don't even tell me you want me back if you wont take me back". Why would she tell me this if she wasn't planning on taking me back in the first place? Today she took everything I ever gave her or any pictures of us on her wall and threw them away. She even took one of the shirts that she slept with when I was away some nights and threw that away. She's getting her talk time with all these guys who know what kind of girl she is ( skank ), and turns around towards me late at night and crys. Its been a repeating pattern for the past 2 - 3 nights. I told her last night "Hey, this crap has got to stop. I don't need this in my life right now. You made your decision to leave me and you're making it difficult when you call me crying".. Then... she starts crying even more.. It got me kind of mad at that point and I just told her that she doesn't need to contact me again and pretty much gave her my 2 cents along with it. Hung up phone... I don't know what I'm supposed to feel. I feel that she would like me back, because her crying sounds like she's going through a hard tine, but at same time she's the one who made this deicision and she keeps saying "cant do it to much. things are different, we have so many years to live. maybe someday".. You women out there, what would you say to any of this? What could possibly be going through her mind. I don't know what to think, I really dont... Link to comment
loulou37 Posted May 21, 2010 Share Posted May 21, 2010 i would just stop all contact with her, if possible, she seems to me that she doesnt know what she wants...shes all up and down. let her go through a hard time, what about you!! did she think about you when you were hurt when she dumped you... let her have some time, so she can decide if she wants you or not... Link to comment
sidehop Posted May 21, 2010 Share Posted May 21, 2010 Atticus, I used to have a g/f like her years ago. Completely selfish and emotionally abusive. It probably didn't help the fact that we were still young and I had this hope and illusion she would somehow change herself and come back into my life. Was I wrong. Just like your ex, she tried to get attention from every guy she can get, slept around and ended up getting pregnant which she married the child's father. Last time she emailed me out of blue which I didn't respond, she was still in and out of the relationship WHILE still married. She's an emotional wreck wanting attention; nothing good will come out of this situation. The more you pull away I'm sure she will come back to you for that emotional support. That's all she's wanting. Don't let her use you as some sort of a crying bucket. Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 21, 2010 Author Share Posted May 21, 2010 Yeah, I plan on going no contact with her for a good while. Right now she doesn't want me to see my son, so I'll be calling his grandparents from time to time to check up on him. I think this is it. Think this is my push to just walk away from this for good. Sure hope to god she wasn't playing hard to get 'cause she fe'd that up bad. Guess it's just another life experience. I'm afraid if i go no contact that she'll show up at my door. Link to comment
sidehop Posted May 21, 2010 Share Posted May 21, 2010 I didn't read that you two had a son. Do you two have any sort of custody/visitation planned out? Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 21, 2010 Author Share Posted May 21, 2010 No, she doesn't want me to see him. I don't have money for court right now so I'm gonna give his grandparents a call and check up on him. Basically do what I can to keep in contact with him without having to see his mother. Think this is it. No more contact for as long as time lets me. Link to comment
sidehop Posted May 21, 2010 Share Posted May 21, 2010 Filing custody shouldn't cost too much and I'd do so as soon as possible. Assuming you two both reside in NC it may be a good thing since the state doesn't automatically side with either parent. I have to ask and it may be obvious but are you sure this is your child? Just reading the other posts about her makes me wonder. Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 21, 2010 Author Share Posted May 21, 2010 Not 100% sure. He has red hair. She has brown, I have brown hair. My mom however had read hair, but I really don't believe in that repressed gene crap. He doesn't really look anything like me, but when I look at him, I just know he's mine. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted May 21, 2010 Share Posted May 21, 2010 I'm sorry for the situation you're in, I'm assuming this is your "ex" that is currently pregnant? Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 21, 2010 Author Share Posted May 21, 2010 Turned out she wasn't pregnant. Think I menchened that in another post. Thank the f christ. Talk about one heck of a situation lol. Anyways, Right now all I've been thinking about is who she's with and what she's doing. Need her out of my head! Link to comment
sidehop Posted May 21, 2010 Share Posted May 21, 2010 Not 100% sure. He has red hair. She has brown, I have brown hair. My mom however had read hair, but I really don't believe in that repressed gene crap. He doesn't really look anything like me, but when I look at him, I just know he's mine. What if for any reason he wasn't yours? You could potentially be paying child support for a child that's not yours. Link to comment
Atticus90 Posted May 21, 2010 Author Share Posted May 21, 2010 What if for any reason he wasn't yours? You could potentially be paying child support for a child that's not yours. Yeah, I'll definitly be getting a DNA test. I think that's required anyways in order to have child support taken out. Man if it turns out he's not mine I would have wasted the past 4 and a half years of my life for nothing. Link to comment
AutumnBorn Posted May 21, 2010 Share Posted May 21, 2010 Not 100% sure. He has red hair. She has brown, I have brown hair. My mom however had read hair, but I really don't believe in that repressed gene crap. He doesn't really look anything like me, but when I look at him, I just know he's mine. You don't believe in science? Wow. I know many people who don't believe in God, but that's a first for me. I can sort of understand, though. I have two children (that I know of). My daughter looks like a Mini Me. My son looks like...? I don't think I'm his mother. Atticus, I think your son needs you to stand up for him, be a great role model, and love him unconditionally. Fight like hell for that kid, whatever it takes. Whoever asked if he was yours can't fully understand the love between a father and son. Biology, for those who believe in it, has nothing to do with being a dad. It's not about money, it's not about child support. It's about love. You called your ex a skank, but you certainly sound like you'd take her back. Is that anger or do you really love a skank? Link to comment
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