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Should I confront him?


Jennibean

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So, in my stupid drunk moment, I let a guy I just met go down on me. The next day, I was in shock, but managed to ask him if he has any STD's to which he emphatically said no. Fast forward 3 months, and Im having a test done for herpes. I think it could be a vaginal tear that just got infected, but the wait (7-10 days) is killing me. I just recently found him on fb ( didnt friend him or anything, just looked him up) because we have a friend in common. He now ( or manybe always) has a girlfriend. I dont want to stir up trouble, but Im so tempted to send him a msg asking if hes ever had any cold-sores. What do you guys think? Is it risky? ( as in he will tell our mutual friend, who will tell everyone else)

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Wow. As the girlfriend (now ex) I suggest that you wait for the test to come back. If it is positive you need to let him know.

I'm tempted to have you contact her too, but that may be just a bit too Jerry Springer...

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Why would you contact him now? You don't know if you have it. You might not. If you do I would contact him (and anyone else you've had sexual contact with) and let them know they should get tested. But knowing if he get cold sores or not isn't going to tell you for sure one way or the other.

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woah woah woah.

 

just WAIT.

 

do NOT contact him, and def. do NOT contact the girls. That is TERRIBLE advice. It has absolutely ZILCH to do with her.

 

Yeah, that's the kind of email I really want to get... "hey your, new boyfriend, or then bf went down on my a few months ago. do you or him by any chance have herpes?"

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woah woah woah.

 

just WAIT.

 

do NOT contact him, and def. do NOT contact the girls. That is TERRIBLE advice. It has absolutely ZILCH to do with her.

 

Yeah, that's the kind of email I really want to get... "hey your, new boyfriend, or then bf went down on my a few months ago. do you or him by any chance have herpes?"

 

Yeah, you're right. I read that initially that he's always had the g-friend, and AS the ex girlfriend of someone who cheated and had an STD...ugh...I'd have welcomed that call. But this isn't the same situation. And even if it was it is still too Jerry Springer.

 

However, if she does find out that she's got it, she should contact him to let him know.

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"your boyfriend has cold sores"

 

really?

 

I'd leave it alone and chalk it up to a lesson learned. Don't let a guy go down on you unless you're sure he doesn't have cold sores. Better yet, until you're sure he doesn't have STDs. Could have been worse, could be worse if you make contact and get in the middle of relationship bs.

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No, thats their bussiness, telling the gf would just be stirring up trouble...the only question I was asking is if I should discreetly ask him before I get my results. After some thought, I think I'll wait for the results before I point any fingers

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