SolitaryMan Posted May 16, 2010 Share Posted May 16, 2010 My ex and I were first together over 9 years ago, split up after about a year (due mostly to being young and having trouble communicating), and after a several month long breakup, finally lost contact completely. Last summer, after 7 yrs of NC, she found me online and contacted me. She told me she had never fallen out of love with me or stopped thinking of me since we split up, and I had felt exactly the same. We got back together within a month of reconnecting, and were both extremely happy for several months. Unfortunately, toward the end of last year, we started having problems communicating again. Most of the problems seemed to stem from the fact that I was in the process of ending a long relationship when we got back together, and she was going through a divorce. A few months ago, following a talk I tried to have with her about her seeming to go from being totally in love with me one week to being distant the next, she ended up walking out one night, taking all of the things she had at my apartment and leaving the spare key. I decided to not try to push the issue with her, and let her go (when I had tried "chasing" her during our previous breakup years ago, it had led to months of heartbreak). So after almost 3 months of NC, and following the advice of a few close friends, I decided to email her last week just to let her know I am sorry that things had to end the way they did, that I will always love her and hope she finds something that makes her happy. She replied almost right away. She told me she was not doing well, that losing me has been harder for her this time than it was the last, which she didn't think was even possible. She apologized for things ending the way they did, and said she doesn't understand how two people that are so in love can have so much trouble keeping it together. However, she did admit to having difficulty dealing with her problems, which she said she is working to resolve. She then said she would never forget me and feels "dumb" for even letting me go. I am not sure what to do at this point. As my original email to her did not suggest reconciliation, I don't know if she is simply not saying anything about it for that reason or if she is just letting me know that she hates losing me but knows we can't be together. I hate the idea of losing the love of my life if she is only waiting for me to say something, but I am afraid to try to make any suggestion of getting back together if she isn't open to it. Any opinions/advice will be greatly appreciated. Thank you all! Link to comment
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