I hate games!!!!!

[sadme]

So I have been seeing this guy once or twice a week for about 3 months. He chased after me for 6 months before we started dating and really seemed to like the chase. Some weeks he texts or calls every day then sometimes I do not hear form him for like 5 days. I saw him Friday evening and stayed over his house, he texted Sunday and now Wednesday he sends me a text saying "How are you?" at 3:30 pm...I respond 45 minutes later as I did not notice the text "It's boring at work, but having a good day" and he has not responded back and it's 9:30 pm.

 

Question....am I getting taken for granted here or what? It seems when I pull back and act disinterested he is interested and when I act interested I get placed on the back burner. Maybe he just does not like me that much and was holding out to do something else tonight than ask me out.

 

I feel like I should now ignore his text when he finally decides to respond.

 

Help! What should I do?

[DN]

Do you initiate texts or just respond to his?

[HeartGoesOn]

Did you ask him how he was in your response?

[sadme]

I have initiated texts many times, but after many text for days and then no text for days I have decided to stop this week and just let him text me. I probably text 20% and he texts 80% of the time. He initiates calling and I never call him. I am just following "The Rules" you know that women should let men contact them. That men like a chase. Ugh!

[sadme]

He usually responds back several times and has a conversation with me. This is just weird! I feel like it may be a game. Maybe he is trying to get me upset. He seems to like drama and I have not played into it.

[ToF]

Why don't you just try contacting him a little more and see what he does? It's possible he just doesn't think YOU are all that interested.

 

What makes you say he likes drama? This seems to be a bigger issue.

[Keyman]

It seems when I pull back and act disinterested he is interested and when I act interested I get placed on the back burner. ?

 

I have initiated texts many times, but after many text for days and then no text for days I have decided to stop this week and just let him text me. I probably text 20% and he texts 80% of the time. He initiates calling and I never call him. I am just following "The Rules" you know that women should let men contact them. That men like a chase. Ugh!

 

You act a certain way to show this or that, you are just following "the rules", These are all great big signs of you playing games. and yet you state you hate playing games.

 

If you are constantly acting disinterested, and only contacting him 20% of the time and never calling him, then perhaps HE is feeling like you aren't interested enoug. How would you like it if he did to you what you do to him? You would HATE it and definitely think that he wasn't interested. So why are you sending him that message.

 

And, what "RULES" are you going by. Maybe I'm a strange kind of guy, but a girl who plays hard to get with me tends to get hard to get in return. You want me to do all the chasing without a fair amount of chasing back, I'll go chase someone that does want to show me more interest. It's a two way street and I think I';ve said it to you in the past. It's not 1960 anymore, it's 2010.

[valenski]

Do you honestly believe that following "the rules" will result in a meaningful, longlasting relationship? This is only my opinion but a guy that chased you for 6 months is probably trying his best not to screw it up, trying not to be too needy. Quit trying to analyse everything and enjoy your relationship, forget the rules and try to remember what it was that you saw in him. Life is not a screen play or a game of monopoly.

[Go Habs Go]

I have initiated texts many times, but after many text for days and then no text for days I have decided to stop this week and just let him text me. I probably text 20% and he texts 80% of the time. He initiates calling and I never call him. I am just following "The Rules" you know that women should let men contact them. That men like a chase. Ugh!

 

 

Hypocritical much? And no, men don't like the chase. If you want healthy relationships, I suggest you eliminate that mentality.

[BriarRose]

Since he goes days without contact, I would say he is seeing someone else, too, or just not that interested.