missing her today almost broke one and half month NC

[flyguy23]

I've been doing so good for the past few weeks! Haven't been thinkin about her been living my life feelin good but since yesterday I've been thinkin about her. I guess I'm missing her because my bday is in fifteen days and I can't imagine her not being there. We talked about her moms surprise 50th bday party and now I'm not gunna be there. She's also goin on a cruise this month that I was gunna go on. All these things are makin me sad. I almost texted her today but I didn't. Still being strong even after a month and a half. Her mom was like my second mom too and it hurts I won't be there. Hating my job cuz I keep thinkin about how she told me it was the job that killed us. Thinkin about the last words she said to me. Please help guys! I wanna be happy again!

[fLuiD]

How has your overall mood been through out your NC? The ups and downs are normal, and how you come up after being down is a true testament to your character. It is an extremely amazing feeling when you realize that a few days ago you were doing bad and now you feel like you are king of the world! Hang in there..it gets easier with time, as cliche as that might sound.