Flirtation from my manager??

[Scaphe]

Er, I'm not exactly sure where to start.

 

At the end of January, I was recently dumped by my girlfriend of 10 months for (what seemed like) a still unresolved issue. While she claimed to still love me, her assurances that our personalities were just too different made it seem like the situation was irreconcilable. It sucks... Whatever.

 

Several months before breaking up with me, she expressed some annoyance that my job kept calling me in to work- especially that it was my manager calling my cellphone directly. I never canceled a date, nor did I ever cut one short, but the calls inevitably did happen. As far as calling my cellphone directly, the option was made available to the two previous managers (a guy, and and older woman), so it's very clear that no special accommodations were made for the newest one.

 

Ok, I'll admit it. She's pretty cute, especially for an older woman. (I'm on the verge of turning twenty-three, and If I were to guestimate, she's somewhere in her late twenties to early thirties.) If I hadn't been in a relationship when we first started working together (and if she wasn't my manager, of course) I might have even made an attempt to talk to her. Silly me, I wanted to be a good guy and stay true to someone, especially a person that I love(d) and loved me. So much for that.

 

Fast forward to the situation afterwards, a lot of my coworkers have been implying that she's been showing considerable favor towards me and the work I do. Not only am I minimally penalized for blatantly ignoring certain rules, apparently I'm given priority as far as hours, and authority goes. Granted, before she came, I had the same hours, and the same authority (the ability to open the change drawers, to authorize certain actions, etc) as I do now. The only difference is, that this cute, young piece of manager apparently smiles and 'flirts' (according to numerous coworkers) and demands that I work extra time (conveniently when she's also scheduled to work).

 

Honestly, I don't see it. For one, she has a boyfriend who's her own age, I don't have my own place, and I'm still in school. IMO these are characteristics that don't carry much weight in terms of attractiveness. I try to be friendly, but as far as flirtation goes- I don't do it knowingly; I usually pretend to be oblivious if ANYONE flirts with me, especially if they have any kind of authority over me.

 

I'd like to think I'm a competent worker in my own rights. I have never had a complaint against me from a customer or fellow employee, and I'm well-liked by them as far as I can tell. I don't want people to think that I don't deserve my position or opportunities that are presented to me, and I can't stand the idea that people are supposing that this woman is treating me unfairly although favorably.

 

What should I do?

 

P.S. Is it tacky to act, however slightly, flirtatious towards this woman?

 

P.S.S. I am very much attracted to this person, although I've been making a very strong effort to behave professionally and with modesty.

[spinstermanquee]

She could just be acting friendly - and since you've put forth such an effort to be professional, she might be showing her professional appreciation by giving you extra work that could result in commendations, promotions, etc.

 

Whatever you do, don't listen to the d-bags that tease. If she was a 90-year-old toothless hag that showed the same appreciation, you'd get teased too. So fluff that off.

 

Lastly, until the boyfriend is out of the picture I'd step very carefully if you DO want to have more than just a working relationship...

 

My .02. Hope it helps

[Scaphe]

She could just be acting friendly - and since you've put forth such an effort to be professional, she might be showing her professional appreciation by giving you extra work that could result in commendations, promotions, etc.

 

Whatever you do, don't listen to the d-bags that tease. If she was a 90-year-old toothless hag that showed the same appreciation, you'd get teased too. So fluff that off.

 

Lastly, until the boyfriend is out of the picture I'd step very carefully if you DO want to have more than just a working relationship...

 

My .02. Hope it helps

 

Thanks. I appreciate that. =3 That's what I'm hoping it is, and it sounds a lot more reasonable than the things I've been hearing.

 

Unfortunately a lot of the people I work with maintain that everyone but me can see she is clearly nursing a crush of some sort. My brother seems to think it's an issue of jealousy on the part of some of my coworkers.

 

The only thing that truly bothers me is that I never received any kind of teasing when any of the other managers did something similar. It came to a head when yesterday, this one offered to buy me a drink for my break, and then proceed to offer me a lift home, as my car was in the shop.

 

You would not believe the stares I got, and I felt like an ass for turning down a simple act of kindness.