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Is this a physical or mental problem????


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Is a man capable of getting erect for a BJ and lasting for 5 or 10 minutes, but not able to have vaginal sex for more than a minute or so?

 

I have been dating a guy for 6 weeks (friends for 4 months) and have given him 8 BJ's (many nites him cuming 2 or 3 times). We had sex for the first time 8 days ago and he came in a minute with me on top. We had really built up to this for so long and not sure if it's physical or mental. Of course I have not heard from him since then except for a couple very short texts as I guess he is embarrassed. He might have an issue with PE or getting it up. Ugh! Help!

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We are both 42 and that night we got right to it without a lot of foreplay. I felt so bad because I knew it upset him so much, but acted like it didn't even happen and I was satisfied. He takes meds for arthritis and bone degeneration. Could that be the issue? He also seems so intimidated by me. He is fine with the BJ's and I could not figure out why he was not trying for more, but I know now why. Funny part is I told him we were going to need 3 hours the first time we had intercourse and we built up to that night for so long. Maybe I put too much pressure on him. Ugh!

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Just be reassuring to him and try again. Maybe try having sex more than once in a day and see if that builds up anymore stamina. If nothing changes after a couple of weeks, he may have some medical issues and should speak to his doctor. The medication he's taking is also a possibility.

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There are a lot of factors that can contribute to why he came too soon. A guy who is a virgin "usually" will go pretty fast their first time. If he is not a virgin, and it was just your first time you said that there was a lot of pressure building up to it, that would probably cause' a lot of the problem.

If you continue to have sex the first couple of times will be trial and error. If this continues that he goes too soon during vaginal sex, you should look at four play. See what you are doing in four play and see if you are arousing him too much.

There are those times that sometimes you can't really hold it. My guy and I have been together almost a year and he sometimes doesn't go at all, takes an hour, or takes a minute, it varies from time to time. Pressure would be a huge factor I would say. But all in all I would say that this is a mental issue.

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