jettison Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Ladies... thoughts on this one: So I'm seeing this new woman. We've went on 5 or 6 dates. Sleepovers the last couple of times. She's already crazy about me, and can't keep her hands off me, and talks about fantasizing about being with me all week. So, that's the gist. I am planning a date for Saturday, but this is the setup... "I'm picking you up at 3:00. We're going shopping downtown. I'm going to dress you. You're getting your nails done. Once we've finished, I'm taking you out to dinner to show you off in your new dress. After dinner, I'm taking you home and taking that dress right back off of you." Thoughts? Link to comment
Catdancer Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Sounds sexy as hell! When is it my turn??? Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 hmmm....... that's a really nice idea, but i would say it's a tad too soon for that. i would leave the 'spoiling' and the 'dress off' type of stuff until the relationship is more established. also, my $$$$ blinkers are going off. what if she falls in love with a $400 dress? this sounds like it can easily turn into a $500 night, if you're not careful. afterall, women need matching shoes as well!!! and accessories. and a jacket. yeah. whenever i go dress shopping, i'm also looking for matching shoes, or a matching purse or whatever. new necklace.... i would maybe save this as a 6 month anniversary gift? my thoughts. looking out for your wallet. i don't know how much sex you've had with her, but i think the 'taking that dress off later' demand might be too much for a 7th date. though like you said, she is very into you. Link to comment
orchidrose Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Sorry, this reads as kind of creepy to me, especially for a 7th date. It just seems kind of objectifying, like she's a doll you get to dress up and show off. Link to comment
Catdancer Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Sorry, this reads as kind of creepy to me, especially for a 7th date. It just seems kind of objectifying, like she's a doll you get to dress up and show off. They are already having sex and depending on their fetishes, he may be a dom, so this is perfect for that type of lifestyle and sexy foreplay. Link to comment
sidehop Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Do you want to pamper her this much so soon? I don't know, I agree with others this may be a bit fast but only you know her Link to comment
sophie274 Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Have you already told her what you quoted? Wasn't sure from how you phrased the OP. I think it's the kind of date I would love from a boyfriend but find to be too much (and, as aneffigy said, perhaps a touch objectifying) from a man I didn't know very well. Also - and this might be just me - I'd feel uncomfortable shopping and and getting a manicure with a man I didn't know too well, just because I'm quite shy and would feel put on the spot a bit too much. Just the vibe of the entire date centering around me would make a bit uneasy, because I don't like being the center of attention, but that's definitely dependent on personality. Link to comment
DN Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 I would advise knowing her a little better first to make more sure that this would be well received. Link to comment
jettison Posted April 29, 2010 Author Share Posted April 29, 2010 Sounds sexy as hell! When is it my turn??? If only you lived next door. hmmm....... that's a really nice idea, but i would say it's a tad too soon for that. i would leave the 'spoiling' and the 'dress off' type of stuff until the relationship is more established. also, my $$$$ blinkers are going off. what if she falls in love with a $400 dress? this sounds like it can easily turn into a $500 night, if you're not careful. afterall, women need matching shoes as well!!! and accessories. and a jacket. yeah. whenever i go dress shopping, i'm also looking for matching shoes, or a matching purse or whatever. new necklace.... i would maybe save this as a 6 month anniversary gift? my thoughts. looking out for your wallet. i don't know how much sex you've had with her, but i think the 'taking that dress off later' demand might be too much for a 7th date. though like you said, she is very into you. We've had a lot, a lot of sex. Hours upon hours upon hours at at time. She's already met all my friends as well... twice. Last time we had a date, I presented her with 3 options for the night. She said, "I am so terrible at making decisions. I can't decide." So, I said, "that's ok, we're complimentary... I like bossing people around." So she said, "ok, then you're the boss of me." So, I am kind of feeding on those liberties with this one, and taking it a step further. I will be playing boss again with this little shopping adventure. It's for me every bit as much as it's for her. Sorry, this reads as kind of creepy to me, especially for a 7th date. It just seems kind of objectifying, like she's a doll you get to dress up and show off. I could see how this would be creepy if you weren't comfortable with someone. And yes, it does have a level of "objectifying" inherent in it... by design. That's how I want it. That's also part of what makes it sexy. It's just a game though. It's like dancing. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Sorry, this reads as kind of creepy to me, especially for a 7th date. It just seems kind of objectifying, like she's a doll you get to dress up and show off. the 'objectifying' thing came up in my head as well. then again, maybe i'm just not used to being pampered? with most of the guys i date, they usually just take me out to dinner or a movie, a really rarely (or never) get anything extravagant! i guess it depends on how much money you have to spend. i think what you describe is a great anniversary gift, but i'm worried if you do something like this so soon, if she will expect bigger and better later on? like you're going to have to top yourself. what about doing something where you can control the costs a little more? like sign the two of you up for a 'couples massage' and then go and get dinner? Link to comment
mmmd Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 hmmm....... that's a really nice idea, but i would say it's a tad too soon for that. i would leave the 'spoiling' and the 'dress off' type of stuff until the relationship is more established. also, my $$$$ blinkers are going off. what if she falls in love with a $400 dress? this sounds like it can easily turn into a $500 night, if you're not careful. afterall, women need matching shoes as well!!! and accessories. and a jacket. yeah. whenever i go dress shopping, i'm also looking for matching shoes, or a matching purse or whatever. new necklace.... i would maybe save this as a 6 month anniversary gift? my thoughts. looking out for your wallet. i don't know how much sex you've had with her, but i think the 'taking that dress off later' demand might be too much for a 7th date. though like you said, she is very into you. agreed. excellent idea for in the future though. Link to comment
jettison Posted April 29, 2010 Author Share Posted April 29, 2010 the 'objectifying' thing came up in my head as well. then again, maybe i'm just not used to being pampered? with most of the guys i date, they usually just take me out to dinner or a movie, a really rarely (or never) get anything extravagant! i guess it depends on how much money you have to spend. i think what you describe is a great anniversary gift, but i'm worried if you do something like this so soon, if she will expect bigger and better later on? like you're going to have to top yourself. what about doing something where you can control the costs a little more? like sign the two of you up for a 'couples massage' and then go and get dinner? Couples massage and dinner... that was Valentine's day with my last girlfriend. I see what you're saying about the cost, but I think I can control that to a degree. I'm not saying "pick any dress at Macy's". We'll shop, we'll compare, she'll try on clothes, I'll tell her how pretty she looks, etc. I have to say, when it comes to this kind of thing, this isn't my first rodeo. I did this with an ex from a few years ago, and it was ridiculous how well it went. I think she said, "I'm crazy in love with you" that night. I have never said the "this is what I'm going to do with you" beforehand kind of thing though, and not in this way. It is really interesting to see the different responses though from different people. Link to comment
FathomFear Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 I am planning a date for Saturday, but this is the setup... "I'm picking you up at 3:00. We're going shopping downtown. I'm going to dress you. You're getting your nails done. Once we've finished, I'm taking you out to dinner to show you off in your new dress. After dinner, I'm taking you home and taking that dress right back off of you." Thoughts? I dunno. Sounds creepy and kind of ...objectifying to me. This woman is an individual. Not some sort of doll that you play with. But, that's just me. Lots of people out there get off on this kind of power play. Link to comment
orchidrose Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 I could see how this would be creepy if you weren't comfortable with someone. And yes, it does have a level of "objectifying" inherent in it... by design. That's how I want it. That's also part of what makes it sexy. It's just a game though. It's like dancing. Hey man, more power to you. It sounds like based on your relationship she'd be into it, given the sort of dom/sub thing you have going on. Link to comment
Lamour detruit Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 I dunno. Sounds creepy and kind of ...objectifying to me. This woman is an individual. Not some sort of doll that you play with. But, that's just me. Lots of people out there get off on this kind of power play. This. Not interested in this personally since I have no desire to tell someone which dress they should wear, and watch them get their nails done and what not for a date. But it's all personal, and it seems you guys are both into it, so I don't see why not in this case. Link to comment
CatsMeeoow Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 hmmm....... that's a really nice idea, but i would say it's a tad too soon for that. i would leave the 'spoiling' and the 'dress off' type of stuff until the relationship is more established. also, my $$$$ blinkers are going off. what if she falls in love with a $400 dress? this sounds like it can easily turn into a $500 night, if you're not careful. afterall, women need matching shoes as well!!! and accessories. and a jacket. yeah. whenever i go dress shopping, i'm also looking for matching shoes, or a matching purse or whatever. new necklace.... i would maybe save this as a 6 month anniversary gift? my thoughts. looking out for your wallet. i don't know how much sex you've had with her, but i think the 'taking that dress off later' demand might be too much for a 7th date. though like you said, she is very into you. I agree - its too early for something like that... and then where do you go from there??? Each time you have to step it up... UGH... I like to be pampered like that for sure but not when I am first dating a guy... I want to see the fun side... the I can be creative without blowing the budget... trust me... no woman wants to see a guy live outside his means... There are so many things... the fun quirky dates are the best... such as cosmic bowling or something BUT if you are looking for romance how bout scheduling a dinner cruise... a picnic dinner looking at the sunset from some really sweet view point. I'd be worried if you did this what else could you possibly do? Good Luck! Link to comment
CatsMeeoow Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 IDK - its like I told my guy... who I am going to marry... Don't spend $1000 on the first piece of jewelry you buy me... what else could you buy after that to top it? Spend $50-60... it will ALWAYS BE THE FIRST NECKLACE YOU BOUGHT ME and will always be special... and therefore he did... I have a very lovely necklace that I know he spent no more than $50... I love it... its pretty and my style and I'll keep it forever... NOW later on... he can shell out the bigger bucks for the something sweet... just saying.... Link to comment
LoveSoDeep Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 I think it sounds like you know her well enough and if you think she'll like it then it sounds great to me! I'm like her and I don't like to make decisions so if a guy I was dating proposed this plan I would LOVE it! I'm with catdancer this sounds awesome! Me next! As others have said if you're worried about cost getting out of control then make sure you make ground rules from the beginning and stick to them... but I say if you want to do it and she is into it then go for it! Link to comment
addictedblue Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 I think your girl is going to love this. Link to comment
JonasWaingaro Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 I agree - its too early for something like that... and then where do you go from there??? Each time you have to step it up... UGH... ^^^This! Talk about entering into an arms race. hehe Link to comment
Tanzi Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 You could put it another way. You could ask her how if she likes the idea of you taking her shopping buyer her something nice to wear, to get her nails done etc and see what what her reaction is. Link to comment
jettison Posted April 29, 2010 Author Share Posted April 29, 2010 This. Not interested in this personally since I have no desire to tell someone which dress they should wear, and watch them get their nails done and what not for a date. But it's all personal, and it seems you guys are both into it, so I don't see why not in this case. Have you ever done it? Maybe you'd like it. Never know until you try. I agree - its too early for something like that... and then where do you go from there??? Each time you have to step it up... UGH... Why would I have to step it up each time? This isn't a contest. It's just a date. I like to be pampered like that for sure but not when I am first dating a guy... I want to see the fun side... the I can be creative without blowing the budget... trust me... no woman wants to see a guy live outside his means... Our first date was a simple dinner at a Cuban restaurant. Our next date was oysters at a local oyster house followed by a French prison movie. Our next "date" was a wine party at a friend's house. They are all simple and fun. Nothing to 'em. And people get to know me quickly, and women are simply at ease with me... almost all women. I just give off the "I've known you forever" vibe I guess. Living outside my means? Not sure how I gave anyone that impression? Did I start a food-stamp thread that I've since forgotten? Maybe I spaced it. I'd be worried if you did this what else could you possibly do? I am not putting on a show for her. I have a genuine interest in seeing her in a new, sexy dress, and an equally genuine interest in taking that dress back off of her. There is nothing false about it at all. And if that's "creepy", then what are the rest of you doing when you mate? I'd really love to know. Does not putting a voice to it make it less creepy for you? Likely, you are dressing up, trying to look your best, seeking attention, getting it, and at some point, sexing each other. I think it sounds like you know her well enough and if you think she'll like it then it sounds great to me! I'm like her and I don't like to make decisions so if a guy I was dating proposed this plan I would LOVE it! I'm with catdancer this sounds awesome! Me next! As others have said if you're worried about cost getting out of control then make sure you make ground rules from the beginning and stick to them... but I say if you want to do it and she is into it then go for it! Fascinating contrast in these responses. Yes, this. I really think she will digg this, and I've done this in the past (something similar), and it has gone quite well. I'm not looking to blow 500 bucks. It's not about money at all. As far as making it too much about sex, I dunno... she dragged me out of the play we went to last weekend so we could go back to her apartment. I don't think it would be possible to be too forward at this point. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted April 29, 2010 Share Posted April 29, 2010 Wow. Shopping and nail salons. Two things I really hate. I won't be much help on this one. Link to comment
jettison Posted April 29, 2010 Author Share Posted April 29, 2010 ^^^This! Talk about entering into an arms race. hehe Sincere thanks to everyone concerned about my wallet. When you guys are buying your girlfriend clothing, how much are you spending? I was thinking about $150 bucks here, and then add in dinner that we'll likely split. 200 bucks. Seems pretty pedestrian to me all things considered. Maybe I'm out of touch. Link to comment
jettison Posted April 29, 2010 Author Share Posted April 29, 2010 Wow. Shopping and nail salons. Two things I really hate. I won't be much help on this one. Ok, but you've never been shopping with me. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.