Can someone explain

[epson391]

What does GIGS stand for?

I know what NC and NIC mean but have no idea what the other is?

[LoveSoDeep]

Grass Is Greener Syndrome.

[TheJerseyKid]

Usually happens when you've been in a substantial relationship of someone, typically I'd say over a year or more. You start to take the other person for granted, not notice all the things they do, start to only see the bad/annoying side of them. You meet someone else, everything seems peachy (much as it was, at the start of your last relationship, since this is the begenning/honeymoon phase) when you compare that to the negatives in your current relationship, it makes the new one look more attractive. So then you break up, jump into the new relationship thinking everything's going to be so much better. Then once you get past the 2-3 month honeymoon phase you realize that the person you left really was much better in the first place... lol

[epson391]

wow thats exactly what my ex is doing!

[TheJerseyKid]

If this is whats going on, I think the best medicine for it is NC. Reason being is it will allow you heal/think less/and most importantly KNOW less about the other persons' situation. If in fact they do realize that they lost something that was much better by leaving you, they will get in contact again. They might not say outright, "I messed up, lets try again" but they will start prodding around to see if you are still receptive to them. If you feel like giving them another shot possibly, you can take it from there. I almost feel like in some relationships this can be a good thing, and make people appreciate the other person more. Others would argue that "True Love" never even has to question it like this. It all depends really.

[hopelessromeo]

I think my ex has some version of GIGS / mid-twenties need for freedom after a 5-year relationship. There was no rebound, she was just looking to play the fiield and wasn't/isn't sure how she feels about me. I went No Contact for the first 2 months and she started reaching out to me. Responded sometimes to her. Now I am meeting her at her request for the first time since breakup next weekend. I think NC is important at first, but NIC is needed for reconciliation. I don't think most dumpers will come back begging if they left for this reason, especially with NC, so will come around "sniffing" first. It's then important to stay strong and prove that you don't need them.

 

Agree or disagree?

[TheJerseyKid]

Fully agree, Romeo.

[Theron]

I think that's maybe something what my ex did. She was with her bf for two years, then 10 months with me, then 2 months with him, then 2 months with me and now she's with him again. I guess his grass is greener.

[SingleStar]

what does NIC stand for?

[TheJerseyKid]

Not initiating contact. i.e. you let your ex contact you, and you can chose if you want to respond.

[Theron]

No Limited Contact, I guess? Like when you're with your ex a co-worker or classmate, or something.

[hopelessromeo]

no contact at all except from them to you...you not responding or not caring drives them crazy, but NC can drive them away at a certain point