I want my best friend,(girl)

[helen34]

My name is Helen, I have a best friend also a girl, we have done lots together going out having fun. We have flirted so many times i have lost count. she has been with a girl before when she was like 16 or something.But lately we have been friends off and on due to fighting over stupid things.We have shared a bed and kissed so often I love being around her.The last time we went out drinking and she was sitting on my lap and i was kissing her neck in this pub I was getting so turned on it wasnt funny and think she did a bit too, but anyway she got off me pretty quick this is the first time i have felt like this, it drives me crazy I want so much although i love men we both have had boyfriends before we have never flirted when we are sober. I really want to talk to her about it. help

[ponyboy]

Pics...or i dont believe you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

lol just kidding. But uh yeah you should probably talk to her, i think you allready know the solution to your problem.

[jengh]

First of all, you can't keep cheating on your boyfriends. Yes, it's still cheating even if it's with a girl. Especially if it's a girl you have feelings for.

 

You need to have a sober talk with her and figure out where you want this friendship to go and in the meantime, re-evaluate your relationship with your boyfriend. What you're doing to him is very unfair.

[Wayfara]

First of all, you can't keep cheating on your boyfriends. Yes, it's still cheating even if it's with a girl. Especially if it's a girl you have feelings for.

 

Well I might be misinterpreting but I didn't get the impression the OP meant she had boyfriend right now, but she and the other girl had had boyfriends in the past.

 

To the OP, I think talking to your friend is the best way to go.

[jengh]

Well I might be misinterpreting but I didn't get the impression the OP meant she had boyfriend right now, but she and the other girl had had boyfriends in the past.

 

Oh, duh. You're right. I need to stop posting when I'm tired.

[Mimori]

The way she worded it sounds as if they’re single currently, not that they’re dating someone atm. From my understanding of what she wrote, it simply sounds like she’s confused about what to do and how to approach the conversation with her bestfriend (who she just happens to be attracted to). To be honest, I would start with slight flirting and try to figure out if she really is “returning” the attraction before I sat her down and told her I was in love with her, you could even friendly joke about how you love her, which happens to be an easier way of testing the waters so to speak. If she’s playing around with you while drunk, obviously she’s either trying to find an excuse to play around with you, just trying to have a good time, or perhaps she doesn’t want to breach into a relationship with you because she “desires” something else moreso, or unsure about dating another girl. This society is very funny about things of this nature, but if you love her you need to make some more educated decisions and stop using alcohol as a reason to make out with her.

 

As the other poster said, you need to reevaluate your friendship and decide if this “fooling around” is leading any where, otherwise it needs to cease to exists. Just because you’ve dated men before doesn’t mean you can’t have feelings for someone of the same sex, love and matters of the hearts is incredibly difficult thing to understand and theres truly no point in trying to…just go with it and your problems don’t really appear as problems anymore (of course, this is if you feel odd for having feelings for someone of the same sex…doesn’t work for every case).

 

If your best friends, you could also just be straight up and honest with her. I’m sure she’d understand either way, without threatening your friendship on the whole ordeal.

 

But anyways, good luck.

[helen34]

that was a really great answer thankyou. Prob is i never get to talk to her when she is sober. But anyway i will try.

[cixelsiD]

I have fallen in love with my best friend (girl), who is in a relationship with an alcoholic, abusive jerk. We've been best friends for about 5 years, and I've seen her through thick and thin. I've told her I loved her in the past, but things got in the way and we ended up having a falling out that lead us to not speak to each other for a little better than a year and a half. I tried to forget her, but she ended up contacting me last summer and we re-united. I did not fall out of love with her though. Now I, once again have re-assumed the best friend role again. She is currently in a relationship with a person who keeps her in near constant pain, but she loves him and doesn't want to leave him even though he's abusive both emotional and physically. I am her shoulder to cry on, on a near daily basis, as I have always been in the past. I have loved her more strongly than any other girl who has stepped into my life. She hasn't shown interest in going beyond a friendship in the past. When I told her I loved her in the past I lost her for a long time. I can't stop thinking about her, and because of the circumstances, I have felt pain on a daily basis for better than five years. I find myself lost and confused because of the way I feel about her, and the fact that I can't grab her love for anything more than a best friend. Her current relationship is on the verge of ending, and I want to try to prove to her that I can be everything good as a boyfriend. I have always been a solid friend to her, and we talk about almost anything freely. I am afraid if I tell her that I still love her, it could bring our friendship to an end again. Has anyone experience this, and does anyone have advise that could help me?