I really, REALLY need advice =(

[lexi94]

Ok well I am 15 and I know for sure that I have feelings for both genders. I am very good friends with this one girl (she is 16) and like I know I definitely have feelings for her. I love her voice, her smile, her personality, and her looks. She really makes me happy and like I really would like to take this a bit further. We had a sleepover just her and I one time and we spent the whole night talking to each other about a lot of things ranging from like religion to school and planets and all that but anyways...I have developed a deep attraction for her and I have even kissed her a few times just as if she were my girlfriend and I think that she might be getting really antsy around me. She didn't resist or anything and she has told me before that she liked it but like...she's been so quiet around me and giving me very blank stares. I wonder if it's really affected her in some way.

 

Sorry if that is too much information but like the problem is, I don't want her to hate me. She's the most understanding friend I've ever had and I would really like to have a wonderful relationship with her because i feel that she is perfect for me and I hope she feels its perfect the other way around. Another problem though is my parents, I don't know how they would feel if i had a girlfriend while being a female myself. It's just that her and i have gotten so close over the years that i've really thought of a future between us both. What should I do? I can't pinpoint any solutions in my head and i really don't want to screw this up. Thank you guys so much in advance, it means so much!

[4ever2gether]

Hey, I am sorry you are going through this. you are so young and its not easy when you start feeling like this for the same gender. How are your parents in regards to gays? do they feel its ok or are they totally against it? is this the first time you actually feel for a female? how did it come about you guys kissed? is she gay? has she talked about being gay? I am sorry i am asking you more questions, but tell us a little more about this situation.

[lexi94]

Ok well my parents are Christian and they get so mad at me for the littlest things and if they knew I was going out with a female they would get really upset. I haven't actually talked to them about bisexuality or anything. Yes this is the first time I've ever felt feelings for a girl. It started at christmas time, we were both laying on her bed watching movies and when we talked to each other, our faces were like an inch apart or something like that and well like...sorry this is really embarrassing for me. We were talking about how much we liked each other and I sort of just slipped and I put my lips on hers and well...just gave her a passionate kiss. I am not sure if she is gay or not but we have talked about sex a lot and well it's hard for me to say, but we compared breasts a little earlier but not in a sexual kind of way.

[4ever2gether]

You may just be curious. I didn’t know I was a lesbian until I was 23. I knew I was always attracted to girls but never really thought I would go that way all the way. So I guess that if you guys have talked about sex and talked about being together maybe you should try it at some point. The very first time you have sex with a girl you will know if you like it or not. As for your parents I have been a lesbian for 3 years now and honestly my parents don’t know and I live with them. My parents are very religious (catholic) and gay isn’t the “right” thing so it’s just something I have had to kept to myself. So maybe you would have to keep it to yourself for a while until it’s the right time or the better time to let your parents know.

[lexi94]

But like how should I approach my friend about this? i feel like I really love her and that we're really close but I don't want to screw anything up. I am just really hoping that things can work out between the both of us.

[Kaytie]

I was out at your age (even younger) and was in a similar situation. We had a sleepover and we stayed up late talking (as usual) and we finally ended up telling each other how we felt.

 

The quietness and blank stares that she's giving you could mean a lot of things - it could mean she is questioning things herself or that she feels as you do and is afraid of addressing it.

 

Can you ask her what's up? Can you ask her why she's been quiet? That may be an opening for talking about things - at the very least you may learn what she's thinking, if only a little bit.

 

Good luck

[4ever2gether]

Well I had the same worry when i started having feelings for my girlfriend. she was always there for me, we talked and when we finally did talk about how we felt for each other i was so scared that we would not remain friends if anything went wrong. therefore we actually discussed this through messanger since she is older and i am at an age where we don't have sleep overs anymore, so i guess what you can do is invite her for a sleep over and see where things go from there. you know? like kaytie said maybe she is going through the same thoughts and feelings and if you open the conversation you guys might find out that you both have feelings.

 

Good luck!

 

Keep us posted!