Confused, super mixed signals!

[thinkofme]

My ex-bf broke it off with me about three weeks ago. At the time he claimed that the reason was that he just didn't "feel" anything for me anymore, (he persued me for a year and a half while I was dating someone else before we got together) and that he felt I had some personal issues I needed to sort through.

 

I proceeded with NC for the next few days (ignoring his texts of "what's up?" "how are you doing?") until I found out there was another girl in the picture. I confronted him about it, and he told me her name and said that there was nothing going on with her during the time that we were together, and that they didn't hang out until after he had broken things off with me. Long story short, i heard from a mutual friend that the other girl he was pursuing didn't want to be in a relationship and my ex was thus rejected.

 

Throughout that entire time I'd get daily texts from him, stuff like "what's up?" "miss ya." "goodnight." and other random comments throughout the day. To which I would ignore, until earlier this week i decided to respond. He told that we should hang out sometime, and i agreed to. We hung last night (he came over, we just caught up with eachother and talked about our lives) and he left. Later that same night i sent him a text telling him that i missed him, and he replied that he missed me too. Then i asked him why we weren't trying to make things work and to which he replied, "i guess i miss you in a different way." He also said that he still has feelings for me, "but it's not in either of our best interests for me to express them."

 

I'm just not sure why he's trying to keep contact like this and telling me these things if he doesn't want to be in a relationship. BTW, we were never "just friends" to begin with, so i can't picture myself hanging out with him as just a friend anytime soon. Any insight as to what could be going on in his head?

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Sounds to me like he likes the thrill of the chase and once he has caught the person he loses interest. He pursued you while you were with someone else....now he tried very hard to get your attention when you were ignoring him. I would say walk away from this guy...he doesn't sound very mature.

[catfeeder]

Sorry to say, this is common stuff. It sounds like he wants you to keep him company while he shops around. By clarifying that he doesn't miss you 'that way,' he believes his conscience is clear of leading you on. He'll gladly use the comfort of your friendship, but he expects you to settle for that gladly until he finds his next interest.

 

I'd walk away from this while you still have your pride and before you're hurt even more. My heart goes out to you.

[thinkofme]

thanks for the replies. I agree with what you guys are saying, that I should continue to ignore him and move on, yet a part of me doesn't want to let go. He still continues to communicate with me via online/text throughout the day. Just tonight I got a text from him saying "Gahhh i miss you."

 

I do not know what to think. =( Or perhaps I do know what to think, I just do not want to go through with letting him go

[dietpepsi]

Strict NC, this guy is a joker, the second you give him an inch he'll disappear until you leave him alone, then it will become a cycle. Take the ego boost away from him.