Ms Darcy Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 I thought I would post some advice I saw on the following site: link removed It has a religious component, but I removed that to give the highlights: "One of the biggest mistakes people make in relationships is to move too fast. Most of us have a friend or two that quickly “falls in love” with a new boyfriend/girlfriend (or maybe you are that friend). One week you are “in love,” the next week you break up and are heartbroken, and in a few weeks you are madly “in love” with someone new. Don’t trust people too quickly or easily. Being trustworthy is a virtue, but being too trusting is not. Wait and make sure someone really deserves your trust. This is true for any type of relationship. As you mature you will grow in your ability to recognize trustworthy people. Have you ever given your heart too soon? Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Very wise words that unfortunately most people don't follow. They do indeed rush relationships, even the older people. Link to comment
Sanesoul Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 I see this sort of thing all the time. Thanks for posting this. More people need to heed this advice. Link to comment
Starbourne Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 I can say with certainty that I did (as did my ex) in my last relationship. In retrospect, it was a bad situation. She had just gotten out of a 3 year relationship with her fiancee a few weeks back (ick) and was beginning to show me affection. We had been friends for awhile before this, and there was ALWAYS mutual attraction between us. Basically she asked me to come out to a party and told me if i needed a place to sleep, i could stay at her place. So, despite the fact that im not a big on partying, i decided to go anyways. We pretty much hooked up a day or two after. For the first month i was careful with my emotions since i figured maybe she was just rebounding with me, but after awhile i decided to let me guard down. 2 months into the relationship, we told each other we loved one another. I genuinely meant it, and maybe at the time, she thought she meant it too. It wasn't long after she started distancing herself from me. At the 3 month mark, we broke up. It seemed very much like a GIGS break up. Grasping at reasons (didnt want to be in a relationship, didnt know what she wanted, scared to commit, said the relationship was a burden, this and that, yada yada) she's emotionally immature, indecisive, started partying like crazy post break up etc, but she's also a serial monogamer and just ended a past relationship. So, was it a rebound, gigs, or just another notch on her belt? Link to comment
Celestialagape54 Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 The link doesn't work.... Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Excellent post...Mssss Darcy! Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted April 24, 2010 Author Share Posted April 24, 2010 I think it was a rushed relationship for someone who wasn't ready for it. I think you have to really take heed of the advice above. This isn't only about her. Why did you rush? Why didn't you take the time to get to know her as a gf? Was there any reason you went at that pace? Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted April 24, 2010 Author Share Posted April 24, 2010 The link doesn't work.... I think it works now. Link to comment
Starbourne Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 I think it was a rushed relationship for someone who wasn't ready for it. I think you have to really take heed of the advice above. This isn't only about her. Why did you rush? Why didn't you take the time to get to know her as a gf? Was there any reason you went at that pace? Those are great questions, and im not entirely sure i know the reasons why. It might be partly caused by my personality. I'm a VERY intense person; type A 100%. Every thing I do, i put full effort in to and go at full throttle, so maybe this has spilled over into my relationships. It may also be partly caused by the fact that i tend to spend A LOT of time alone. I'm very introverted and don't tend to socialize much, despite having an amazing support network from some very close friends. It might of been that i was lonely and was looking for someone to spend time with, and when the opportunity arose, I dived in, head first. I feel there is more that im missing, so i need to sit back and contemplate more on the subject matter. Do you have any advice/opinion/experience to offer? If so, i'd love to hear what you have to say. Link to comment
uncomfynumb Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Ms Darcy, I fell in love with you after approximately five posts. Is that too soon? Good thread btw! Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted April 24, 2010 Author Share Posted April 24, 2010 Ms Darcy, I fell in love with you after approximately five posts. Is that too soon? Good thread btw! Haha, that's totally ok. But I waited for you to post 20 times before I fell back Link to comment
uncomfynumb Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Haha, that's totally ok. But I waited for you to post 20 times before I fell back LMAO! xoxo Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 It's unfortunate the mod cut the excerpt. I think it could have been helpful to people. Link to comment
Animelover6764 Posted July 25, 2010 Share Posted July 25, 2010 why do people rush in relationships? Link to comment
25something Posted August 2, 2010 Share Posted August 2, 2010 I'm guilty of serial dating, and thats why I've given myself some time to stop dating and get my pathetic patterns a reality check (this took me a few years) I use to deny it all the time but I wanted to avoid the loneliness, sometimes ppl don't even notice that they do it. But, yes rushing in and trusting people too quickly may turn into a disaster that will leave your heart broken. Link to comment
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