Does NC work to win back an ex?

[SadAndy]

Am I right in thinking that NC works to get a response from an ex or is it just something to help you get over an ex?

 

If it can be used as a tool, does it work if the ex is already 'loved up' with a new guy or only if they are still single?

[abitbroken]

I would advise against NC as a ploy to win someone back. There are some folks that get back together after NC because they took that time to heal, and to get to the point where it didn't matter either way if they were ever with that person again - in other words the neediness was gone. Sometimes the other person realizes what they lost - but that doesn't always happen. Go NC for YOU.

[hottboarderchick]

My fiance (we will call him "J") and I had NC for about a year or a year and a half. I was with the last bf before him for a year and a half or so. I still loved J at the time. We got back in contact by MySpace and talked for the last half of my previous relationship. The bf I was with at the time ended up being stupid and doing online dateing sites... anyways... As we had NC for a while my love for J grew and visa versa.

 

So in my experience I think it does do good if you two still have feelings for one another. Like the last post it might not work for all but it's worth a try. You never know what will happen. Time apart doesn't hurt one bit. So give it some time and maybe after a long while (I'd say more than a month or two) shoot a line and see what's up. Time will only tell and whatever happens... its for a reason. If she ends up with someone she may not truly love that person and realize she still truly loves you.

[SadAndy]

Thats what I was wondering. She does still have feelings for me but apparently they are 'not enough' and she has moved the new younger bloke in and is apparently madly in love with him.

 

I miss her like crazy even though she treated me like sh&t, having 2 long term affairs and dumping me for this new bloke.

I find it hard to believe (even though its how it appears) that she has got over me within 2 months after 14 yrs together and just wondering really if the NC (or LC as we have a child together) would do anything to her.

I don't think we could ever get back together but it would be nice to know that she is at least missing me a little bit!

[iBroken]

We should sticky NC.

 

NC isnt to bring anyone back - its to heal yourself and get past the trauma of a break up

[turnera]

You find it hard to believe? ROFLMAO

 

She cheated on you multiple times and dumped you?

 

What on earth makes you think she cares one whit about you?

[SadAndy]

You find it hard to believe? ROFLMAO

 

She cheated on you multiple times and dumped you?

 

What on earth makes you think she cares one whit about you?

 

 

I know! You are so right but having known her for 14yrs and how upset she appeared at the end and also how well I treated her, I still find it hard to believe.

 

Deep down though, I know you are spot on which is why I cannot see us ever getting back together even if she did want to. It would just be nice to know that she is missing me a bit.

 

I guess its just that i'm struggling so much with this and the fact that someone who I spent so much of my life with could treat me this way and yet move on so quickly! This is the worst pain ever!