as strong as i have been...

[cucumbercool]

today i have my doubts. my ex e-mails me a one-liner that says, "don't be a stranger". I went to immediate NC the day we broke up. it's been about four months now.

 

i know he's moved on and has met someone else. i know he's bitter that i cut him out completely after the break-up and that makes me sad. i don't have the capacity in me to hold grudges. broke but not angry. not bitter but hurt. sad because i don't know why we ended. morose because i did not meet what he wants in life. broke because i've lost him to someone else.

 

yet, i am not supposed to distance myself, according to him. i don't know what he wants me to do. i've been respectful of him time by not contacting him so that i wouldn't be a burden when he meets someone else and also to respect that other person.

 

i don't know how to respond to his e-mail. i've been courteous and polite since the day we've been done. i feel that this was his decision - and because of that, i'm the only person in the world who can't make him feel better about it.

[FrenchFries]

That little one liner doesn't even need a response. You have done well in spite of your pain. I don't know why...I don't have an answer for it, but it seems to be the status quo for "dumpers" to keep trying to communicate with their ex, many times with no intention of getting back together. It's cruel and perhaps they don't truly understand what they are doing, but I would say just delete that email and continue on your journey of healing.

[eikal]

My ex texted me today, i deleted her from my phone so i asked who it was. She said her name and i never replied. She sent me two more texts. I deleted them. (we broke up 8 months ago) keep going i promise it will get better, the pain will fade and you'll meet someone new. i PROMISE

[Saudade]

yes..I agree with frenchfries....Dont bother responding him back...It was his choice to take you out of his life...You owe him nothing.

[britomart]

I know how you feel. In my case, I didn't go straight NC, but I did distance myself which p*ssed him off so that when I did talk to him he blew up. Now he has a major grudge against me and from his last message he is never speaking to me again.

 

For me, I couldn't be friends knowing that he was seeing someone else. It was killing me because I still have feelings for him.

 

You don't need to send him an email, but if you haven't explained why you went NC, an explanation might stop these txts. You're not obligated under any circumstances.

 

Although...dumpers have a nasty way of holding grudges for consequences resulting from their decisions.