help! really quick - to text back or not?

[abigheart]

I broke 2 weeks of NC last Wed., caught up with my ex and it went well. I showed I was doing well, he showed he was doing well. However, I'm still hurting very much and am determined to keep up with NC this time around. I would love to reconcile at some point but have definitely removed that as a possibility in the near future sigh.

 

Well I didn't even think he'd get in contact with me so fast, though. He just texted me now! He asked if I wanted to get groceries with him

 

I really can't at the time he suggested b/c I have a meeting but ugh. I don't want to be mean...

[GenoGeno]

Get groceries with him? who says that....ahaha

I'd put it off and say you can't.

[abigheart]

Get groceries with him? who says that....ahaha

I'd put it off and say you can't.

 

lol it's because we go to a university and don't need a car. we have to use the bus to get around and get groceries haha. but he started a rental car program where you can just drive one any time you want.

 

so random i know.

 

but am i supposed to sound friendly? why the hell did i give him the impression that i was doing 100% ok? gah.

 

and also i just feel bad that i'm gonna be throwing him mixed signals now if i go ahead with NC.

[misssmithviii]

You are doing better, so emit that. When he does try and talk to you, either don't reply or tell him you're busy and you're schedule doesn't permit for such spontaneous events like grocery shopping with your ex.

[abigheart]

I'm actually NOT doing any better...which is why I can't just be friends immediately with him.

 

Do you think I should give him the full "low-down" on why I actually can't be friends anymore. I don't feel like announcing NC to him completely...

[believeme]

Just tell him that you just went shopping so you don't need to go.

[abigheart]

Well, I texted him "hi, thanks but I have a meeting" which is the truth!

 

Is it better if I announce NC and my reasons to him sooner rather than later? How have others dealt with it?

[getbiii]

i say no, unless it is needed or he asks... let his mind wonder, if he doesn't reply back then perfect no explanation needed. and if he does then he will wait for a reply lol which is good too =)

[abigheart]

i say no, unless it is needed or he asks... let his mind wonder, if he doesn't reply back then perfect no explanation needed. and if he does then he will wait for a reply lol which is good too =)

 

haha okay - no response back so I don't think he'll be asking anything more. I shouldn't feel too bad right? WHY do I feel so bad if he's he one that broke it off? Sigh..I have to start thinking for myself now. Maybe I'm too nice.

[getbiii]

maybe because you did want to go?

maybe because you don't want him to think you are lying to him?

 

who knows =)

don't feel down,

feel great =)

you are great!!

the only way to get throu this is by thinking positivly

[abigheart]

I really did have a meeting. He must have thought I was making an excuse but I should stop even caring about that. I also delayed my answer by an hour haha. does this even matter?

 

Thanks getbii! Yes! We're all great. Trying to be as positive and strong as I can.

[doiiiieeezie]

If you two were still in a relationship and if you had to go a meeting, wouldn't you go to that instead of dropping everything for him just to get "groceries"?

 

I know that we all like to drop everything when the ex contacts us, but you also need to start learning that life will go on regardless with or without him, and I am pretty sure that you can catch up with him some other time. Be strong.