how can i gain her trust

[alexl0923]

so my girlfriend has been over by two of her boyfriends....she slept with the first one of these and then he went and cheated on her...the second one after a month, cheated on her she had another relationship that she just stopped and is still friends with and now shes with me.....but still really cautious about trusting people...

 

im a genuine guy i don't do drugs like her ex's i don't cheat im loyal, she knows this i know she does, in the fall we are both moving away to college/university both two hours away from where we are now (4 & 1/2 hours away from each other) i need to prove that she can trust me in from that far away without cheating on her, she knows i trust her to the fullest, i really do

 

what can i do to get her to trust me?

[Blue Skittles]

I don't think there is anything you can do other than give it time.

 

Her trust issues are something she will have to get over herself, its really hard when a past experience causes you to lose faith in someone you don't even know.

 

Some things that my bf does to keep my trust are:

- being open and honest with me about everything

- calling me every night even when we aren't together, even just to say "I love you"

- making time to spend with me

- including me in social get togethers

- introducing me to friends and family

- writing little messages on facebook saying he's enjoying his weekend with me. (even though I don't have facebook). lol

[alexl0923]

thanks....im always honest...she hates phone calls but i do text her every night before i go to sleep...i always move my schudle around her...she hates my friends and my friedns hate her....so... i love introducing her to people and i always include her in my updates....hahaha

 

seems that im doing everything i can thanks

[arcadefire]

I've been in her shoes before, and it wasn't until I met my current boyfriend that I allowed myself to love and trust again.

 

What he did to help me was to ensure me that he isn't "one of those guys", those guys who played me in the past. While dating I met his friends, his roommate, etc. who told me qualities of his character that allowed me to believe that he was a trustworthy person.

 

I also find that he showed me such care, patience, and love to finally allow me to melt my heart. Since you two will be in a LDR, it would be best to call her daily and tell her about your day, your friends, etc, however mundane. That way, she can get a sign of what you do during the day and night so that she can trust you.

[shessofly]

it's gonna take time, patience and consistency on your part. that's really all i can say. i am very, very, very slowly coming around to trusting my guy after having been through a horrible experience with my ex. he has been VERY patient. hopefully she feels like she can open up to you at some point and start talking out her feelings. it has helped us a lot.

[Blue Skittles]

Do you think there is maybe a little problem if she doesn't get along with your friends??

[alexl0923]

Do you think there is maybe a little problem if she doesn't get along with your friends??

 

Thanks guys...and i just wrote a song for her...she seemed to like it.....andneh the friends thing is minor actually....i think she is afraid of them....and they well anyway.....thanks guys im starting to think she will come around at least imnot alone in the world i love her dearly

[ItRainsItPours]

honesty is your best tool for gaining trust. however it does come with a price. I've been told by guy friends, ex girlfriends, and female friends that I am way too honest. now I am not rude or insulting by any means. but I dont censor myself.

 

for example if Im partying with my friends and my girlfriends bummed she couldnt see me that day and asks me what I'm doing, I tell her I'm drinking with my mates. now my friends will tell little white lies and say they're at home studying but I never do that. being honest in these situations isn't always a good thing and starts a lot of fights. so take this with a grain of salt.