Did I do anything wrong here?

[mmmd]

Went out on a 2nd date last night. Went eh, didn't get the vibe she really liked me, I didn't particularly like her, nothing really doing either way.

 

She had made it a point she doesn't like wasting time and was worried to see me because I was leaving in a few months anyhow, and, like she said, she doesn't like wasting time.

 

When I got home I shot her a text thanking her for a nice, fun night, but that I felt like that should be the last time we saw one another and saying it was nice meeting her.

 

She said "not even let's be friends? harsh." conversation carried a little bit, nothing really said.

 

This morning I texted her saying I didn't mean to offend her by being terse and she replied,

 

"well you failed."

 

Seems like she's being a bit dramatic, no?

[Shallow]

Seems like she's being a bit dramatic, no?

A little.

 

However, it would've been better to handle this with a phone call and not a text. Texts don't convey emotion very well, whereas if you had called, she could've picked up inflections in your voice that you were at least a little sorry to end it, and that you really did enjoy the short time you had together.

[mmmd]

agreed, but we don't speak on the phone, only through text

[Shallow]

agreed, but we don't speak on the phone, only through text

Therein lies the problem.

 

If there was some sort of technical limitation that prevented phone communication, then it would've been better to do it in person.

 

It's not the end of the world, and you were polite about it, but it's just something to remember in the future.

[BriarRose]

You did the right thing. She was just a little hurt and lashed out. That's not your fault.

[mmmd]

why was she hurt though? didn't seem like she was into me?

[BriarRose]

why was she hurt though? didn't seem like she was into me?

 

Maybe she was more into you than you thought or could just be a bruised ego. No one likes rejection.

[Justnotsure]

You did nothing wrong; in fact, I think you did more than the situation called for. Dating is called dating because it's getting to know people with no obligations or commitments. The fact that she was talking about long term future after the first date, in my opinion, is pretty nutty (and I'm a female).

[mmmd]

I agree. If she did like me, she had a terrible way of showing it... I mean, god awful.

 

Oh well. Walking home from the date I got accosted by a very attractive, albeit drunk, New Zealander and her friend who was mothering her. Would've been a nice consolation prize, though it wasn't meant to be.

[HouseKitten]

Hey, she was hurt. Some people can take it gracefully, some people feel they want to lash out. It sounds like she probably picked up your disinterested vibe throughout the date and wasn't feeling that amicable towards you even before you texted her.

 

But since you don't want to date her anyway, it's no big deal. Some girls will take that sort of thing without even replying, some will be nice about it, and some will attempt to bring you down a peg or two. Just because she wasn't that interested either, doesn't mean she liked the reality that you definitely weren't into her. Everyone likes to be liked, even by people they have no real interest in.

[arakal]

Nobody like rejection but I don't think you did anything wrong. It was just the 2nd date. If she's that upset after a 2nd date just imagine what dating her would have been like. Good call.

[teabee]

Hey, she was hurt. Some people can take it gracefully, some people feel they want to lash out. It sounds like she probably picked up your disinterested vibe throughout the date and wasn't feeling that amicable towards you even before you texted her.

 

But since you don't want to date her anyway, it's no big deal. Some girls will take that sort of thing without even replying, some will be nice about it, and some will attempt to bring you down a peg or two. Just because she wasn't that interested either, doesn't mean she liked the reality that you definitely weren't into her. Everyone likes to be liked, even by people they have no real interest in.

 

That sums it all up very nicely.

[mmmd]

i don't think i was giving a disinterested vibe, but aside from that, i think there's nothing much more left to say.

 

go team!

[Brightest Dark]

I agree. If she did like me, she had a terrible way of showing it... I mean, god awful.

 

 

Was she shy in any way? Sometimes we don't like revealing our feelings especially if the other person doesn't seem to show any. She may have really liked you but because you didn't show any obvious signs she kept hers to herself too.