Getting over someone/met someone else

[RoadRage]

So as some of you will have read in my countless number of past posts, there's this girl who pretty much broke my heart to speak. I'd asked her out twice, and both times she said she couldnt and that she wasnt ready, yet, nevertheless after turning me down she did lots of one-on-one 'friendly' things with me. I decided to give it one more go a couple of months ago because i thought she liked me (and rightly so), and again she turned me down, saying that even though part of her wanted to give it a go, that she just couldnt....

 

So I was prepared to get over her, or at least try and get over her. And i was doing kind of well. A month had passed and I met another girl, pretty cute, who i wanted to get to know better.

 

But two weeks ago, the other girl - the one i really liked- told me that she liked me and that she wanted to go out with me- that she couldnt bare the thought of anyone else going out with me. And so we both agreed to give it a go. Then one week later she said she couldnt, that it was too stressful and too weird, and that even though she liked me and would be jealous if another girl went out with me, that she just couldnt go through with it.... she's never had a boyfriend so maybe that's why.

 

So I've decided to let her go- as in, not try to pursue her anymore. It's going to be hard to get over her, because i see her all the time - she's a really good friend and i dont want to lose the friendship- but i think i can do it. It would be kind of silly to keep trying, because if she was suddenly to change her mind and want to go out with me, i would always have this fear that she'd break it off again....

 

So I'm pretty confused about my feelings atm. Would it be wrong of me to keep asking this other girl (the girl i met recently not the girl i'm trying to get over) to coffee, (but not on a date or anything- just a casual coffe - she's in my class so its not too hard)? She's nice, we've already had coffee together once and I think we got on pretty well. I just don't want to let myself like someone again and get heartbroken. Is that a bad/selfish attitude to have? (I mean i do want to meet someone, and be in a relationship with someone, i just want to know that they like me- i don't want to get my hopes up and have them crushed.)

 

Anyone here been in similar situations??

[eikal]

Well first off, i'd like to make a note about the girl that broke your heart. From what you've said, apologies if i offend her or you im simply giving oppinions, shes kind of using you as her "jacket" so to speak. She can put you on and wear you whenever she wants and hang you back up whenever she wants. That's what shes coming off as. Now i would only pursue this new girl IF you don't want to try with the old girl. Because if the old girl tells you again she wants to try things again because your seeing a new girl then that's just being quite unfair to the new girl. So if you believe you can handle rejecting the old girl if she comes after you then go for it